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The "imperial guard" serie continue...

freefire13 wrote:

mussie76 wrote:

halonachos wrote:

Gwar! wrote:

Hmm... a hole in a helmet makes no sense. Its like putting a hole in a fence when you build it. Also makes her vulnerable to rear headshots from flanking enemies. Close combat would be a mess with that ponytail as well.

Its a Imperial Femguard quit bringing logic into this.....

i swear if anyone ruins this for me ill kill with flashlight witch will be slow and pain full

You said "witch" instead of "which". I am calling the inquisitor you dirty heretic.

But still, no logic in putting a whole in a helmet or even trying to make yourself look different. I think its a military quote saying "Look unimportant, the enemy may be low on ammo.". By making yourself look distinguished(i.e. ponytail) you make yourself a nice target. If you look like everyone else, then they may just shoot everyone else and not you. Also about mixed regiments, in the gaunt novels they say that the women often beat up the guys trying to get lucky. You shouldn't try to do it with someone with the same and same amount of combat training as you.

right thats it! screw logic! she fit so feth u!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Logic is necessray, its what keeps humans alive. For the most part at least.

The rest is a lot of luck. Horrah probability

How many Inquisitors does it take to change a light bulb?
3. One to do it, One to shoot him for doing it and One to completely deny the existence of lightbulbs

What day do Space Wolves hate the most?
neutering day.

The Thousand Sons, archenemies of the Space Wolves have developed a whole new weapon to specifically fight them.
A rolled up newspaper

(This is from one of the workers at my flgs) This is why Ork Fighta Bombas should have boarding planks.
Ork pilot sees a thunderbolt that he likes
Boarding plank goes over
A few minutes later you see the planes flying side by side, the thunderbolt with a ripped open cockpit with the ork at the controls and an imperial pilot with no parachute tumbling down to the ground.

How many Slaaneshi Marines does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, but don't ask me how they got in there.

Cheese Elemental wrote:How many Slaaneshi Marines does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, but don't ask me how they got in there.

facepalms "oh dear lord"

I lol'ed for almost a minute reading that one

Cheese Elemental wrote:How many Slaaneshi Marines does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, but don't ask me how they got in there.

things not to say to the gw employee
So, how much is this?
Are you gay?
Oh, so this is why your wife left you.
What "team" do you collect?
I've just started playing. Is Marneus Calgar a good starter unit?
That's daylight robbery!
How can you survive outside GW, do you need a gas mask or something?
Do you have a girlfriend?
6 trees for £20! That's a rip off!
Isn't hobbycraft terrain cheaper?
Ever jacked off anywhere other than your chair?
These aren't games, just plastic pieces of crap!
How much is this Lemon Russ?
Don't you feel guilty, dirty and full of shame when you go home?
Doesn't working for GW want to make you kill your co-workers?
Aren't Space Marines a bit overpowered?
The way you've painted that thing with horns makes it look really cute!
Do you have a life?
Why is it that these guys have had guns for thousands of years, and yet have reverted back to fighting with axes and swords?
Do your customers realize they are being robbed? Seriously, GW crap is expensive. You'll never be able to afford a home if you keep playing. Do you have a home?
Isn't this just another face of obsessive D&D [see forum posting rules]?
Ooooooh, like video games. Without the fun!
There was a Chuck Norris model released in 2004 but it was recalled when over four hundred people died from ownage over-dosing.
What can I get for a buck?
Does that model come in men's?
Do those dice come in men's?
Does that rulebook come in men's?
Does that 6" ruler come in men's?
That 6" ruler is your penis.
Does it still come in men's?
You make the best domino pieces ever.
I thought Satan was the only one who dealt in the bartering of souls for material possessions.
Wow, this stuff is really expensive.
Why the hell would I pay $8 for super glue?
Can I just use your bathroom?
I'll buy it when some rich person dies and leaves me their fortune.
Oh my god! What the feth is that smell!? Sniff, sniff; Is that... Is that you!?!
You know there are other things outside of this store right?
Space Marines suck!
You guys are geeks!
N00b!
Orc is spelled Orc not Ork.
I thought Rhinos were animals.
Aww sucks. Can I roll again?
Is this move legal?
But the book says...
Do the models come assembled?
Do they come painted?
Can you paint my models for me?
Do you have the latest Squats codex?
Can that black spiky guy hit that blue guy with that big tank thing?
WHY THE HELL NOT???!!!
Oh gak! no-one panic. Don't tell ANYONE or this'll happen to you too. *runs out of GW*
Do you live for the beeping noise?
What do i do now?
What about now?
Do you like my girl friend?
Is it my move?
Do their arms move?
How do you play?
wow this place is full of nerds...oh you work here?

lolz

Don't you feel guilty, dirty and full of shame when you go home?

QFT

shadowice558 wrote:
my last game: out of a 30man boyz squad, my last scoring unit on the field was a single boy, that single boy survived 3 ld tests and an entire turn of an entire tau armys shooting...

also having my opponent force me to roll to hit and wound with all 65 potential attacks from my nobz squad...

have you since promoted this boy to warboss??? its only fitting that, with those escapades, he would grow to monstrous proportions and become a warboss himself

shadowice558 wrote:
my last game: out of a 30man boyz squad, my last scoring unit on the field was a single boy, that single boy survived 3 ld tests and an entire turn of an entire tau armys shooting...

also having my opponent force me to roll to hit and wound with all 65 potential attacks from my nobz squad...

By the way, i was that tau player.... You wanted to attack with so many bloody hits you have to roll them... and that bloody ork boy.... survived a hammerhead's full amount of fire (burst cannons, railgun) and a suit with missle pod/plasma rifle combo (with targetting array too). That was one damn lucky ork...

The Emperor Mastercard Joke:
Flak armor and fatiges: 20 imperial credits
Lasgun, Canteen, and a butter knife: 10 imperial credits
Having zero chances surviving your first engagement as a whiteshield: Priceless.

lol

Ensis Ferrae wrote:

shadowice558 wrote:
my last game: out of a 30man boyz squad, my last scoring unit on the field was a single boy, that single boy survived 3 ld tests and an entire turn of an entire tau armys shooting...

also having my opponent force me to roll to hit and wound with all 65 potential attacks from my nobz squad...

have you since promoted this boy to warboss??? its only fitting that, with those escapades, he would grow to monstrous proportions and become a warboss himself

he is getting a unique paintjob when i get another detail brush (little brothers are a pain)


rematch later today scopeh?

lol

When I think of some thing else that is funny I'll post it. Till then, thanks to the one guy who liked it.

[Why are Space Marines "so good?"]

Guardsman "How is it that that Space Marines only suffer 100 casualties, when we suffer 100,000?"

Commissar: "Well, through out the entire 25 year war, a fraction of our casualties are simply from old age. The rest are.. well.... quit falling back and there'd be a considerably lower amount of casualties. But anyway, to sum it all up really, the Space Marines show up in the last hour of the fight."

Guardsman: "So... basically... over 25 years, we suffer less than 100,000 casualties from actual combat, and Space Marines suffer 100 in only an hour?"

Commissar:"Hmmm, yes, actually. If only the guard's hardwork would get some credit every now and then, I'd be getting payed so much more."

Guardsman: "So.. Let me get this straigh... We basi-*BAMPH*"

Commissar: "He asks too many questions.. And so remember, men, if we hold them up long enough, we'll buy enough time for the Adeptus Astartes to show up and take the credit"

That piece of humour is badly written. 100 casualties for the Spess Mehrens is a massive loss; an entire company. Author fails.

/fluff nazi

No, its not. Cheese Elemental fails.
/ anti-fluff nazi

you both fail.
/anti-spam nazi

EPIC FAIL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
YOU BOTH LOSE!

roflmao

*facepalm*

I could not resist putting these 2 up

mg 32 pages and this hasnt been posted?



and here is a pic i took in london

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v417/AbyssRaven/funnyvader.jpg

Ugh, the caption reads "Redundant worker trying to support family"
Stupid luke should stop leeching off ad already

I think it goes well with http://i92.photobucket.com/albums/l35/geobattlemage/unemployment.jpg

Also no humour thread can be done without the absolutly EPIC "do the demon primarchs still hang out" http://www.warseer.com/forums/showthread.php?t=115241
Linked to thread since its to long to paste

:p