hotsauceman1 wrote: Maybe I'm lucky, maybe now I will know why I might get stood up.
what should I do, at friday class see if she still wants to get together?
I remember when I met my wife for the first time. She also had a boyfriend at that time.
Also, do not be fixated on this one girl. I hate to tell you this, but chances are you will not even get a second date. Instead, be fixated on the idea of dating and the process of meeting people to date. That will be a far more valuable lesson to learn.
I'm not fixated, the reason I'm kinda bummed is that, after years of trying, and several rejections, I get a date, I'm estatic. Then I find out she might not even have considered it that, or in all likelyhood show up. A no would be fine, I'm OK with that, but having a great feeling like that, then to have it go away like that kinda sucks.
Even if the date goes nowhere, use it as a learning experience. Treat it like it’s going to work out. It might surprise you.
When I first met The Wife, she was dating someone else. She moved across the country to be with him, they broke up, and she moved back home. You never know where life will end up, so don’t burn any bridges you don’t have too.
On the hair topic, I had long hair when I first met The Wife, and she liked it that way. I think I started to grow it out in my senior year of high school, and kept it most of the way through college. Maintenance was a major PITA though. I needed to cut some of the stress out of my life, so it got the chop. On the flip side, The Wife had short hair, but started to grow it long a bit after we got married. Now it’s everywhere, she has crazy thick hair. Even at my longest, I could get a ponytail the width of a pencil; I have very fine hair. What’s left of it these days...
On the hair topic, I had long hair when I first met The Wife, and she liked it that way. I think I started to grow it out in my senior year of high school, and kept it most of the way through college. Maintenance was a major PITA though. I needed to cut some of the stress out of my life, so it got the chop. On the flip side, The Wife had short hair, but started to grow it long a bit after we got married. Now it’s [b]everywhere[b], she has crazy thick hair. Even at my longest, I could get a ponytail the width of a pencil; I have very fine hair. What’s left of it these days...
For me, shaving my head was just something I needed to do. I had special shampoo for my hair which was 10$ or more a bottle, and if I went a day without washing it, it itched horribly.
And I was going bald........Like stupidly bald, and going to university made it worse.
So byby hair. Now all maintenence is replace with shaving twice a week.
So i think I found one. Kind of acts really nervous around me, and tends to stare. So I think I am basically on the other side of the situation for once. Kind of feels wierd. How do I approach this, I know very little about her. I am not very interested, but I think the practice would be good. I am running an iron kingdoms game later this week, think that would be a good idea? Help?
FoWPlayerDeathOfUS.TDs wrote:So i think I found one. Kind of acts really nervous around me, and tends to stare. So I think I am basically on the other side of the situation for once. Kind of feels wierd. How do I approach this, I know very little about her. I am not very interested, but I think the practice would be good. I am running an iron kingdoms game later this week, think that would be a good idea? Help?
If you arent very interested I'd have to question the logic of hitting on someone, I mean sure the practice might be nice but you -can- flirt and build confidence without hitting on someone that you arent all that fussed about. The flipside being you ask her out, despite not being bothered, and then find out that X number of other prospects passed you by because you were seeing someone.
hotsauceman1 wrote:I'm not fixated, the reason I'm kinda bummed is that, after years of trying, and several rejections, I get a date, I'm estatic. Then I find out she might not even have considered it that, or in all likelyhood show up. A no would be fine, I'm OK with that, but having a great feeling like that, then to have it go away like that kinda sucks.
Gotta ask, was it clearly a date or was is two friends going for coffee/stuff? Just because a guy/girl are doing stuff together like seeing a movie etc it isnt neccessarily a date, it could quite easily of been a friends thing.
hotsauceman1 wrote: I know think that is what she might have thought it was.......who knows.
I'd still go, worst comes to worst you end up having a fun few hours chatting to a cute girl you get along well with, there are far worse ways of spending an afternoon.
FoWPlayerDeathOfUS.TDs wrote: So i think I found one. Kind of acts really nervous around me, and tends to stare. So I think I am basically on the other side of the situation for once. Kind of feels wierd. How do I approach this, I know very little about her. I am not very interested, but I think the practice would be good. I am running an iron kingdoms game later this week, think that would be a good idea? Help?
Invite her to get a cup of coffee and ask her about herself?
Quick question. How would I know, if a girl is interested in me or not.
I am not sure she 'fled' out of the room because of me, or because of the other person. Its very interesting to me that this is happening to me now of all times. :/ before I turn twenty one.
I'm not sure if this would be exactly on topic here. What do I do if a girl that i specifically don't want to be in a relationship with says she likes me. I'm in High School, BTW. By extension, what should I do if a girl asks me to dance at prom?
Spoiler:
I probably can't slow dance to save my bloody life.
I'm not the kind of guy who would ask, and i'm also not afraid of asking, i just have too much homework.Kind of the opposite of getting a date.
Thanks!
SirSertile wrote: I'm not sure if this would be exactly on topic here. What do I do if a girl that i specifically don't want to be in a relationship with says she likes me. I'm in High School, BTW. By extension, what should I do if a girl asks me to dance at prom?
Spoiler:
I probably can't slow dance to save my bloody life.
I'm not the kind of guy who would ask, and i'm also not afraid of asking, i just have too much homework.Kind of the opposite of getting a date.
Thanks!
SirSertile wrote: I'm not sure if this would be exactly on topic here. What do I do if a girl that i specifically don't want to be in a relationship with says she likes me. I'm in High School, BTW. By extension, what should I do if a girl asks me to dance at prom?
Spoiler:
I probably can't slow dance to save my bloody life.
I'm not the kind of guy who would ask, and i'm also not afraid of asking, i just have too much homework.Kind of the opposite of getting a date.
Thanks!
you are at a hkghschoo, dance, all they do is hump.
SirSertile wrote: I'm not sure if this would be exactly on topic here. What do I do if a girl that i specifically don't want to be in a relationship with says she likes me. I'm in High School, BTW. By extension, what should I do if a girl asks me to dance at prom?
Spoiler:
I probably can't slow dance to save my bloody life.
I'm not the kind of guy who would ask, and i'm also not afraid of asking, i just have too much homework.Kind of the opposite of getting a date.
Thanks!
you are at a hkghschoo, dance, all they do is hump.
SirSertile wrote: I'm not sure if this would be exactly on topic here. What do I do if a girl that i specifically don't want to be in a relationship with says she likes me. I'm in High School, BTW. By extension, what should I do if a girl asks me to dance at prom?
Spoiler:
I probably can't slow dance to save my bloody life.
I'm not the kind of guy who would ask, and i'm also not afraid of asking, i just have too much homework.Kind of the opposite of getting a date.
Thanks!
you are at a hkghschoo, dance, all they do is hump.
:( I know I should learn to dance. But at my school, theres like 140ish students, and I did this, it wouldn't go well
SirSertile wrote: I'm not sure if this would be exactly on topic here. What do I do if a girl that i specifically don't want to be in a relationship with says she likes me. I'm in High School, BTW. By extension, what should I do if a girl asks me to dance at prom?
Spoiler:
I probably can't slow dance to save my bloody life.
I'm not the kind of guy who would ask, and i'm also not afraid of asking, i just have too much homework.Kind of the opposite of getting a date.
Thanks!
Do it.
You won't regret it.
Go to prom, learn how to dance.
Im fairly sure my parents would be upset. Anyway, the only girl that I had the remotest chance with is waay too short to dance with. And it might ruin my status as a badass
At high school dances I preferred slow dances. They were easy. Hold the girl, sway. Fast songs required flopping around like a pithed toad. Not a fan. Not that I went to a lot of school dances. I did learn how to ballroom dance, although that was in middle school. Good, if horribly out of date, life skill to have. Shame I’ve forgotten most of it.
Go to your senior prom.
Give the girl a chance, if it doesn’t work out, break it off as painlessly as you can.
Size matters not.
Happy Valentines Day everyone. Good luck and stay safe out there!
Im fairly sure my parents would be upset. Anyway, the only girl that I had the remotest chance with is waay too short to dance with. And it might ruin my status as a badass
What go to prom?
Umm. That last bit makes me question quite abit about your character.
hotsauceman1 wrote: feth the world and the cruel unforgiving god that controls it.
I just found out she has a boyfriend.........I'm not sure why she said yes........
Sorry to hear that man. Well maybe she wants to break up with her boyfriend. Not sure if that's a good sign though that she's looking for other guys without having broken up with her current one.
The girl i used to love would throw herself out in a sexual way often. Considering she had a boyfriend and probably did it for attention i find that rather disgusting. I mean if she's not in a relationship that's fine but i'd be pissed if i was her boyfriend and she always did that behind my back. I dunno maybe she wasn't that great of a person and i was totally enthralled by her looks and the fact she liked everything i did. It also helped she laughed at some of the stuff i said. I can be a pretty funny guy after all as you've seen with the super saiyan pubic hair bit.
SirSertile wrote: I'm not sure if this would be exactly on topic here. What do I do if a girl that i specifically don't want to be in a relationship with says she likes me. I'm in High School, BTW. By extension, what should I do if a girl asks me to dance at prom?
Spoiler:
I probably can't slow dance to save my bloody life.
I'm not the kind of guy who would ask, and i'm also not afraid of asking, i just have too much homework.Kind of the opposite of getting a date.
Thanks!
you are at a hkghschoo, dance, all they do is hump.
Make a heavy metal mosh pit
Automatically Appended Next Post:
Nevelon wrote: At high school dances I preferred slow dances. They were easy. Hold the girl, sway. Fast songs required flopping around like a pithed toad. Not a fan. Not that I went to a lot of school dances. I did learn how to ballroom dance, although that was in middle school. Good, if horribly out of date, life skill to have. Shame I’ve forgotten most of it.
Go to your senior prom.
Give the girl a chance, if it doesn’t work out, break it off as painlessly as you can.
Size matters not.
Happy Valentines Day everyone. Good luck and stay safe out there!
thanks, i am gonna need it.... Weird if i go to 60s and 70s party in the nightclub to FIND a future date??
Valentines Day gets overrated anyways in my opinion. What's different about that day, that you couldn't have done any other day? Birthdays and anniversaries are the big ones that need more effort.
Valentines I guess you're expected to do something more, but really just need to be thoughtful if anything.
n0t_u wrote: Valentines Day gets overrated anyways in my opinion. What's different about that day, that you couldn't have done any other day? Birthdays and anniversaries are the big ones that need more effort.
Valentines I guess you're expected to do something more, but really just need to be thoughtful if anything.
A bunch of girls I know got married today. AKA They are trophy wives.
ugh stupid brain stop being annoying.
so...my mind has decided that I DO have a goal in life. because it wasn't happy when I decided to spend my life helping others by putting my own life on the line and thus repent for some of my many sins. no that wasn't good enough for stupid brain.
no, now I've finally grown "feelings" and a "heart".
My goal in life is to fall in love, and to stay in love. the problem being A, I'm effectively one of the scummiest people on the planet so finding a romantic partner will be difficult and B, I don't even know if the kind of relationship I want exists in the real world.
call it wistful thinking, but one day I want what we see in movies. I don't want sex, I have no interest in it. What I want is a companion who I can dedicate my life too. stupid brain.
the shrouded lord wrote: ugh stupid brain stop being annoying.
so...my mind has decided that I DO have a goal in life. because it wasn't happy when I decided to spend my life helping others by putting my own life on the line and thus repent for some of my many sins. no that wasn't good enough for stupid brain.
no, now I've finally grown "feelings" and a "heart".
My goal in life is to fall in love, and to stay in love. the problem being A, I'm effectively one of the scummiest people on the planet so finding a romantic partner will be difficult and B, I don't even know if the kind of relationship I want exists in the real world.
call it wistful thinking, but one day I want what we see in movies. I don't want sex, I have no interest in it. What I want is a companion who I can dedicate my life too. stupid brain.
I find this difficult to believe. If you're in the same category as serial killers, oppressive dictators, etc, before you're even an adult then that's pretty impressive. Otherwise the whole "I'm so awful" act isn't helping anything.
so finding a romantic partner will be difficult and B, I don't even know if the kind of relationship I want exists in the real world.
call it wistful thinking, but one day I want what we see in movies. I don't want sex, I have no interest in it. What I want is a companion who I can dedicate my life too. stupid brain.
Asexual people exist and some of them want relationships. They're rare, but perhaps instead of just assuming that you'll never be happy you should put your effort into looking in the right places (try the appropriate communities/social networks/etc for asexual people).
the shrouded lord wrote: ugh stupid brain stop being annoying.
so...my mind has decided that I DO have a goal in life. because it wasn't happy when I decided to spend my life helping others by putting my own life on the line and thus repent for some of my many sins. no that wasn't good enough for stupid brain.
no, now I've finally grown "feelings" and a "heart".
My goal in life is to fall in love, and to stay in love. the problem being A, I'm effectively one of the scummiest people on the planet so finding a romantic partner will be difficult and B, I don't even know if the kind of relationship I want exists in the real world.
call it wistful thinking, but one day I want what we see in movies. I don't want sex, I have no interest in it. What I want is a companion who I can dedicate my life too. stupid brain.
If my father has taught me one thing, it is that alchohol does not a happy make. besides, docter pepper pretty much tastes like a mix of rum and cola. and medecine.
Automatically Appended Next Post: Alcohol makes you very happy p.m. until you wake up with a picture on your phone of some girl you never met and a recording of you doing karaoke in a cab that you don't remember.
Automatically Appended Next Post: Alcohol makes you very happy p.m. until you wake up with a picture on your phone of some girl you never met and a recording of you doing karaoke in a cab that you don't remember.
I thought about that....but decided against it. After an hour I knew why she didnt show. And ,I also decided im going out more often, even with my friends stay home, Im going solo if I have too. Cant hurt can it?
hotsauceman1 wrote: I thought about that....but decided against it. After an hour I knew why she didnt show.
And ,I also decided im going out more often, even with my friends stay home, Im going solo if I have too.
Cant hurt can it?
Nope. Do your thing. That girl was pretty fething rude to just not show, even if it was just a friend thing. You'd best believe that if one of my mates stood me up like that I'd be straight on the phone going 'where the feth are you? Standing ME up? Who the feth do you think you are? Give your head a wobble.' etc
the shrouded lord wrote: A, I'm effectively one of the scummiest people on the planet so finding a romantic partner will be difficult and B, I don't even know if the kind of relationship I want exists in the real world.
call it wistful thinking, but one day I want what we see in movies. I don't want sex, I have no interest in it. What I want is a companion who I can dedicate my life too. stupid brain.
A. I can tell you right now I've met and even been with people far more scummier than you think you are, don't be so hard on yourself.
B. Depends on what you want, movies exagerate a lot. But, the ideal relationship for you does exist.
the shrouded lord wrote: A, I'm effectively one of the scummiest people on the planet so finding a romantic partner will be difficult and B, I don't even know if the kind of relationship I want exists in the real world.
call it wistful thinking, but one day I want what we see in movies. I don't want sex, I have no interest in it. What I want is a companion who I can dedicate my life too. stupid brain.
A. I can tell you right now I've met and even been with people far more scummier than you think you are, don't be so hard on yourself.
I've been told I'm to hard on myself, but the thought just won't go away. it all circles around.
(I'm a bad person>no I'm not>that's self-pity, self-pity is bad > I'm a bad person >no I'm not >That's self-pity, self pity is bad >I'm a bad person.)
The second date I had planned with The Wife was to get together for a picnic in the park in Saratoga. I assumed Congress Park, downtown, She assumed Saratoga State Park on the south end of town. We were both so sure we were talking about the same place, we never double checked. After waiting a few hours, I went home thinking I was stood up. I honestly forget who called who to straighten thing out, but one of us did, rather then just bitterly assuming the whole thing was over. We re-scheduled, things progressed, and now we’ve been married almost 15 years.
Communication is critical. Don’t assume the worst; ask. Worst case scenario, you have an awkward phone call or text. best case you patch up your relationship before it gets broken.
the shrouded lord wrote: A, I'm effectively one of the scummiest people on the planet so finding a romantic partner will be difficult and B, I don't even know if the kind of relationship I want exists in the real world.
call it wistful thinking, but one day I want what we see in movies. I don't want sex, I have no interest in it. What I want is a companion who I can dedicate my life too. stupid brain.
A. I can tell you right now I've met and even been with people far more scummier than you think you are, don't be so hard on yourself.
I've been told I'm to hard on myself, but the thought just won't go away. it all circles around.
(I'm a bad person>no I'm not>that's self-pity, self-pity is bad > I'm a bad person >no I'm not >That's self-pity, self pity is bad >I'm a bad person.)
I'm too hard on myself too, but I don't consider myself scummy or bad because of it. Just tend to get more down when I do get depressed about stuff and blame myself too much for failures.
Well, I feel like I just dont know what to do, how to get a date and so forth, I need to go out an meet people, but my friends dont want to. This last Fri and Sat they stayed in and did nothing.
I want to meet people, but is going to a bar or club alone really that bad?
It would largely depend on your confidence, there may well be nothing wrong with going to a bar/club alone if you have the confidence to get talking to people, but the more likely scenario is then being sat in a bar/club alone drinking, which there is largely something wrong with. You're in college so I assume you have on-campus events, parties, mixers etc, all of which are suitable for solo attentance to meet new people.
the shrouded lord wrote: ugh stupid brain stop being annoying.
so...my mind has decided that I DO have a goal in life. because it wasn't happy when I decided to spend my life helping others by putting my own life on the line and thus repent for some of my many sins. no that wasn't good enough for stupid brain.
no, now I've finally grown "feelings" and a "heart".
My goal in life is to fall in love, and to stay in love. the problem being A, I'm effectively one of the scummiest people on the planet so finding a romantic partner will be difficult and B, I don't even know if the kind of relationship I want exists in the real world.
call it wistful thinking, but one day I want what we see in movies. I don't want sex, I have no interest in it. What I want is a companion who I can dedicate my life too. stupid brain.
Teenage angst. It gets better.
And then you hit middle-aged existentialism.
Automatically Appended Next Post:
hotsauceman1 wrote: Well, I feel like I just dont know what to do, how to get a date and so forth, I need to go out an meet people, but my friends dont want to. This last Fri and Sat they stayed in and did nothing.
I want to meet people, but is going to a bar or club alone really that bad?
Tough break. Sorry.
Are you really good in bars/clubs? If the answer is yes, then go out alone.
If the answer is no, then try meeting people a different way. There are literally thousands of social groups and societies on campus. Go visit a few.
Remeber play to your strengths and just get in front of people.
I think I'm looking in all the wrong places and the wrong people.
Maybe I will hit up the anime club and other geeky pursuits.....
Maybe the girl for me isn't at the club or bar, but there?
hotsauceman1 wrote: I think I'm looking in all the wrong places and the wrong people.
Maybe I will hit up the anime club and other geeky pursuits.....
Maybe the girl for me isn't at the club or bar, but there?
Maybe. Here's hoping.
Anyway as much as you guys say there are 'no leagues' think of what you would go for in a woman and maybe see themselves as doing similar for you. If you look at a girl that doesn't look particularly good and looks messy then chances are girls are going to see you in that way if you don't properly take care of yourself. Try going for girls that maybe aren't the prettiest around. Some of them are really decent human beings and if you cut back on looks you can probably manage to get a girl with more skills. As i said before my version of 'a league' isn't exactly just about looks but everything. This takes into consideration looks, money, skills, charisma, intelligence and personality of how decent of a human being you are. Think of it like an rpg in the character creation menu where you only have so many points to spend creating your character. You can't be like a 2 in every category and expect somebody that's a 10 in every category. Chances are if you go for a good looking girl you're going to have to aim down in personality, skill, intelligence and other good traits to match. Perhaps it's a weird thing to think of but some people have agreed with me on this. Girls with low self-esteem tend to aim lower just as some guys do but often taking advantage of this is scummy unless you want to build them up but chances are if you do they might leave you for somebody they think is better.
What you need probably is to realize you're a decent person and build yourself up by getting better at things and setting goals that you can accomplish. Maybe success breeds confidence. Also i'd say branch out with your interests. Try finding something you like that girls tend to like. Put yourself in situations where you'll be meeting women and more often than not in a way where you get to know them a little (like 'lab time' during a science class in school or maybe chatting em up). Perhaps getting a wing-man to help each other boost confidence in each other and possibly even have a wing-man that's in a relationship that helps you get one.
That's about all i can think of really. I'm also need to take my own advice and hope it works. Currently i just don't have the money to go out and i'm waiting for the next semester of school. God i hate winter in michigan which is why i skipped it after last year's craziness.
@not_u: I'm actually curious about the female perspective on some things or really just somebody that isn't interested in the same types of people. Liking somebody a lot can blind you to a lot of a person's shortcomings and often they might be a bad person in general. Also girls act different around guys than they do other girls and the same goes for how guys act. I feel like having a sort of 'Girl Spy' to tell who's decent and which women are absolute b*tches that don't give a crap about anybody would be an infinitely useful tool. That said it's hard for me to just be friends with a girl. The way i see it is one or the other would end up liking each other. In your case it's a bit different with guy friends since you're gay (it'd only be one way interest and if they're not attracted to you there's no chance you'd want them in a relationship) but for straight girls it might be different. It does make me curious how the situation is finding people when gay though. I imagine having fewer numbers and not knowing who is and who isn't can be tough unless you guys have like a gay-dar (it's easier to find somebody when you're similar to them). Hope that's not offensive for some. Bender used that term in futurama so it's just a joke and hopefully if it's safe for futurama it should be safe for this board.
flamingkillamajig wrote: Think of it like an rpg in the character creation menu where you only have so many points to spend creating your character.
20 on Strength, Toughness and Agility, 3 on Intelligence, Wisdom and Charisma .
Well yeah and no. Also i like to think of it that some people have more points they can spend but if you want somebody good for you then chances are you need somebody that has as many points. Maybe that's a weird way of looking at it.
Anyway if you want to improve your odds increase those stats. Get stronger, smarter and become a better person. Chances are it'll get the ladies swooning over you. Just try not to let it get too much to your head or you'll lose some personality points ;P.
Well improving yourself would in a sense increase those stats. At least it gives people hope if they wish to better themselves and maybe get the girl or guy.
In a sense life is a big grind for experience so yeah you will grind.
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Btw i get the feeling a couple reasons why i haven't got a girlfriend other than not getting out there to find one is that my standards are way too freaking high for what i have to offer. I have issues being in a relationship if i don't think i love the person or mesh well with them. If i don't mesh well with them i fear it won't work out and i can't bring myself to leave a girl in tears because it didn't work out. Also i wanted my first to be special at least and if it doesn't work out then maybe i would go for random romps with women provided they knew that's what i wanted and they wanted that too (in other words though a little harsh what that girl did with hybrid actually was kind of ok because she told it to him straight and he was ok with it to a degree). Course i think i'm a little too old to have just some romp with a woman without having a relationship. I find myself rather disgusted with plenty of people that are only in the relationship to bone. That said finding plenty of girls/guys for that is rather hard since supposedly getting it with the same person too much results in developing feelings.
I suppose they're all just excuses as far as girlfriends go and i don't think i'm great enough to get all these girls for some night of fun. Anyway it's mostly that i just don't have the heart (or lack of) to break a girl's heart if it doesn't work out so i want to go in sure that it's somebody i'd want to be with. Lord knows plenty of girls have broken my heart already and it hurts like h*ll.
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When i was finishing up the physics class there were a couple girls i could've possibly gone out with. The chinese girl (actually from there) was ok but i think she was a little too christian for my tastes (at the very least i'm agnostic and i don't think i could deal with no sex till marriage in a relationship unless the girl was the one) and when i rode in her car with her (since i don't have one and she helped) she had a couple bobble head dolls with a guy and girl kissing and it just made me feel she was way too innocent. She gave me a couple rides when i needed help and opened some doors for me and because i'm a guy i couldn't very well let her open a door for me so allowed her to go first. She's nice and helped but goes to sunday school and just seemed too innocent usually and i didn't want to in a sense make her bitter, sad or make her less pure in a way. So i guess in some senses i chickened out instead of dating her. I did study with her once just personally but i just couldn't bring myself to try dating.
One girl that i was a little into said she was gay and in a relationship though that may have been a lie since during the last day i talked to her i may have seemed slightly like a creep/jerk. Which i don't think i am i just don't like harry potter and she was a big fan of it and i won't lie to get a girl for some fun because it wouldn't work out if i lied about myself. I have the opinion to be honest about yourself and you'll find your match and if it doesn't work out because of that it wasn't meant to be.
Then there was a waitress that while cute (and had a cute voice) always seemed unable to make time for the class. I heard she was often busy but i was a little miffed that she couldn't set time aside for class and because of that in my eyes felt like she had a lack of care in the class or at the very least to put effort into showing up. She always showed up at the end of class too. I can excuse up to about 30 minutes late but an hour and a half every time seems to show a lack of dedication to something. Perhaps that's unfair and she may have been a decent person and asked to study with me even though i had about the same grades after i offered her some chocolate thinking she was really nice for helping the teacher though that ended up being a name confusion and was some other teacher instead. So i got the decent person conufsed (whoops).
Finally there was a girl that was at least originally from eastern europe and i called her on the phone a while after and she seemed really nice and helped me out and was rather happy i asked her out but she had a boyfriend.
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Some of all those choices only the asian girl might end up being the one i go with. Personally i would've been into the last choice because she seemed a better fit maybe provided i get to know her and she didn't have a boyfriend. Perhaps i should've dated each of these girls. That said i lack guts and certain ones got crossed off the list.
Well, the thing is there is not really a “better” for everything. Each person has different taste, and something that might make you more attractive to someone might make you less attractive to someone else. That said, I do not know if climbing did that or if “it was me all along” (I so really want to put a link here, but the last panel from that strip is completely NSFW, so I am just going to say that Oglaf's Delivery is funny but very, very NSFW and do not search it on your favorite search engine ever), but I certainly like my body much more than I used to.
flamingkillamajig wrote: Btw i get the feeling a couple reasons why i haven't got a girlfriend other than not getting out there to find one is that my standards are way too freaking high for what i have to offer.
My standard are mostly “someone that is interested and shows it”. Once I manage to find someone filling that criterion, I will check if I actually have others . But since without at least that one, there is literally nothing to be done…
flamingkillamajig wrote: in other words though a little harsh what that girl did with hybrid actually was kind of ok because she told it to him straight and he was ok with it to a degree
What harsh? It was sweet, she was very nice! She was honest and respectful and caring, what more could I have asked from her? It was not kind of okay, it was 100% entirely okay. [edit]I mean, if she had not been very upfront about it, and if she had not insisted on making sure I was okay with it and did not felt pressured in any way, yeah, it would have been very different, but she did all that. I had all the information I could need, I made a choice and I do not regret it.[/edit]
Automatically Appended Next Post:
hotsauceman1 wrote: Well I found the anime club at school. lets try that.
I could meet new people....
If you are into anime, that can only be a positive experience, even if you do not get a girlfriend out of it.
At least finding a girl that likes anime should be easier than finding a girl that likes war gaming and is also not gay or taken. A forum i used to frequent with war gamer girls seemed to state about half of them were gay. I once joked half of war gamer girls are gay and half are taken.
Fortunately the pool of women who don't play miniatures games but approve of their partners doing it is much bigger. And that's where you should be looking, unless you're really determined to share that one particular hobby. Someone who is into similar geek hobbies (scifi, RPGs, etc) and says "nice models, but it's not for me" is almost as good. You'll still be able to enjoy your game with other people, and your partner will at least understand why you like it even if they never play.
Since Ashiraya is not taken, then this means some lesbian gamer girls are taken. Yay logic!
Oh it's true that each isn't exclusive but most war gamer girls that are straight are taken. In the other forum there was a few girls that were gay and in relationships. In fact i wonder what percentage of war gamer guys are taken in comparison to gay war gamer girls.
I'm always curious if i was gay if it'd be easier to find somebody if only because it's easier to find somebody of the same sex with the same interests. Then again there's a smaller drawing pool of possible partners. Also i've heard when you're looking for a possible relationship partner it's different.
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Ok so maybe i'll be going way off here for some but i'm always curious why with mating partners why we're restricted to just one person whether for males or females. I mean i have friends and i have a best friend and though it causes some jealousy it's not like they'd kill us both for being friends or even being better friends. Why is it then with a romantic relationship we're just stuck to one person? I suppose it's just tradition and society and maybe STD's would get super fierce but it's just always been a curious thing to me. I mean do we seriously need to be so ultimately important to somebody that they can only ever refer to us as their lover? That seems kind of selfish. I dunno i guess it's just about how society is. Funny how traditions shape us i guess.
flamingkillamajig wrote: Ok so maybe i'll be going way off here for some but i'm always curious why with mating partners why we're restricted to just one person whether for males or females.
flamingkillamajig wrote: Ok so maybe i'll be going way off here for some but i'm always curious why with mating partners why we're restricted to just one person whether for males or females.
You are not unless you (or your partner) wants to.
flamingkillamajig wrote: [@not_u: I'm actually curious about the female perspective on some things or really just somebody that isn't interested in the same types of people. Liking somebody a lot can blind you to a lot of a person's shortcomings and often they might be a bad person in general. Also girls act different around guys than they do other girls and the same goes for how guys act. I feel like having a sort of 'Girl Spy' to tell who's decent and which women are absolute b*tches that don't give a crap about anybody would be an infinitely useful tool. That said it's hard for me to just be friends with a girl. The way i see it is one or the other would end up liking each other. In your case it's a bit different with guy friends since you're gay (it'd only be one way interest and if they're not attracted to you there's no chance you'd want them in a relationship) but for straight girls it might be different. It does make me curious how the situation is finding people when gay though. I imagine having fewer numbers and not knowing who is and who isn't can be tough unless you guys have like a gay-dar (it's easier to find somebody when you're similar to them). Hope that's not offensive for some. Bender used that term in futurama so it's just a joke and hopefully if it's safe for futurama it should be safe for this board.
Well to start with I'm bi so that probably makes it a lot easier.
As for becoming blind to someones shortcomings, I think that's probably a bad thing. You should be able to accept or look past them, but some are also harmful to them and I guess should be worked at together.
As for being friends with someone, I don't really feel like sexuality should bring into if you can be friends with them or not. Should be able to manage a decent friendship, though there is a point it can get to basically. But, that depends on both people anyway.
Since Ashiraya is not taken, then this means some lesbian gamer girls are taken. Yay logic!
I uh what?
Suppose, just to explain the reasoning, that there are only two gamer girls in the whole world and you are one of them. Then, if half of the gamer girls are taken and half of the gamer girls are lesbian, that means there is exactly one gamer girl that is taken and only one that is lesbian. Since, from what you said itt, iirc, you are not lesbian, and you are not taken, that means the other gamer girl is both gay and taken.
There are obviously more than just two gamer girls, but still, basically, you prove that is really half of the gamer girls are taken and half of them are lesbian, there exists at least one gamer girl that is both taken and lesbian.
The trouble with this argument, besides being kind of awkward, is that it depends on an assumption that there are at least two gamers. In fact, the entire gaming community is nothing more than sub-programs of Peregrine, the god-like AI that runs the universe simulation. Since Peregrine can obviously not be both gay and straight or single and not single, and arguments about half a person don't make any sense, the entire tangent should end here.
@not_u: Honestly imagining you were lesbian helped me out a bit though i think you believe in things i don't. I just can't really see a friendship working so easily with a guy and a girl if both are heterosexual. Perhaps that's strange but i've been in a sense friend zoned and i'd rather not do that to any women that might see me as more than a friend.
Once again maybe it's the fact i don't have many possible female companions or haven't really had a lot of dates or romantic partners but for me it's just really hard to be just friends with a girl if i like her and she seems to like me. Unless we somehow both appeared really ugly to each other through some sort of dime a dozen movie comedy premise (similar to jack black seeing a woman for how good of a person they are when he's dating a super fat woman in a movie). That said i don't see that happening. While i'd also like to not sound too shallow i do at least take looks into consideration (probably more so than i'd like to admit).
People do need to take care of themselves though. That said i used to know the biggest D-bag that went into relationships just for the sex and treated his girlfriends like garbage, stole things (even from me), lied, cheated, drank while driving and was all around a pretty terrible person but he was a clean freak, was good looking and to an extent knew women. I'm actually rather sad for his family having to live with the guy. He must have burnt so many bridges in his life.
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@peregrine: So you're saying that a part of yourself has never been bi-curious. Also imagine a part of you was made into a smaller version of you only all the gay of you was put into that one program. There you go there's a part of peregrine that is gay or mostly gay.
Besides i've known straight people to give birth to gay people as that's generally how it happens (unless gay people go to a sperm/birth clinic or whatever).
Besides a sub-form of yourself can just be of an aspect of yourself. Perhaps 5% of your courage and 95% of your wisdom was thrown onto a sub-form of yourself. While another had the opposite. In a different instance take peregrine's 5% gay and give it all to one sub-peregrine. That one person is now mostly gay but also features other peregrine aspects.
flamingkillamajig wrote: I just can't really see a friendship working so easily with a guy and a girl if both are heterosexual.
Why not? Being heterosexual doesn't mean that you're attracted to each other. And even being attracted to each other in some way doesn't mean that you think you should act on that attraction.
Perhaps that's strange but i've been in a sense friend zoned and i'd rather not do that to any women that might see me as more than a friend.
First of all, friend zoning is a stupid concept. Second, if someone sees you as more than a friend then it's their obligation to say something and not just sit around passively hoping you'll suddenly decide to love them.
Perhaps that's strange but i've been in a sense friend zoned and i'd rather not do that to any women that might see me as more than a friend.
First of all, friend zoning is a stupid concept. Second, if someone sees you as more than a friend then it's their obligation to say something and not just sit around passively hoping you'll suddenly decide to love them.
It's called being shy. Some people have issues telling others how they feel esp. if they have a serious crush on somebody. I can talk to plenty of girls but the really cute ones that like everything i like and everything i like in a girl make me nervous. Sorry if peregrine's opinions on something don't apply to everybody. There are always exceptions to rules and some theories to be disproved. Plenty of people disagree with everybody here as has been shown.
Peregrine wrote:The trouble with this argument, besides being kind of awkward, is that it depends on an assumption that there are at least two gamers. In fact, the entire gaming community is nothing more than sub-programs of Peregrine, the god-like AI that runs the universe simulation. Since Peregrine can obviously not be both gay and straight or single and not single, and arguments about half a person don't make any sense, the entire tangent should end here.
You know what? I am okay with this. Could be far worse.
Hybrid Son Of Oxayotl wrote:
Suppose, just to explain the reasoning, that there are only two gamer girls in the whole world and you are one of them. Then, if half of the gamer girls are taken and half of the gamer girls are lesbian, that means there is exactly one gamer girl that is taken and only one that is lesbian. Since, from what you said itt, iirc, you are not lesbian, and you are not taken, that means the other gamer girl is both gay and taken.
There are obviously more than just two gamer girls, but still, basically, you prove that is really half of the gamer girls are taken and half of them are lesbian, there exists at least one gamer girl that is both taken and lesbian.
Oookaaaay.
Sure.
Peregrine wrote:
First of all, friend zoning is a stupid concept. Second, if someone sees you as more than a friend then it's their obligation to say something and not just sit around passively hoping you'll suddenly decide to love them.
flamingkillamajig wrote: It's called being shy. Some people have issues telling others how they feel esp. if they have a serious crush on somebody. I can talk to plenty of girls but the really cute ones that like everything i like and everything i like in a girl make me nervous.
Ok, yes, some people are shy and have to work on communication. But there's a difference between acknowledging that some people are shy and refusing to be friends with someone because you're paranoid that they might be shy, secretly in love with you, and in pain because you don't return their secret love.
flamingkillamajig wrote: @not_u: Honestly imagining you were lesbian helped me out a bit though i think you believe in things i don't. I just can't really see a friendship working so easily with a guy and a girl if both are heterosexual. Perhaps that's strange but i've been in a sense friend zoned and i'd rather not do that to any women that might see me as more than a friend.
Once again maybe it's the fact i don't have many possible female companions or haven't really had a lot of dates or romantic partners but for me it's just really hard to be just friends with a girl if i like her and she seems to like me. Unless we somehow both appeared really ugly to each other through some sort of dime a dozen movie comedy premise (similar to jack black seeing a woman for how good of a person they are when he's dating a super fat woman in a movie). That said i don't see that happening. While i'd also like to not sound too shallow i do at least take looks into consideration (probably more so than i'd like to admit).
It makes sense, different people working different ways and all that. It's quite possible it's from not having many possible female companions like you say. Which comes across as a bit of desparation, but this is a dating advice thread on a wargaming site so it's a bit of a given.
But, the idea of friendzone and such is like a trap, likely the combination of the two is what gets in the way of being able to make friendship with them.
Can someone explain me why i got this feeling that this thread is about Ashiraya not dating.... Seriously she's just a girl who is into 40k and wargaming, no wonder why there are so little wargamer girls(Yea, most of us got or had a GF at some point but, i got this theory why are there so little Wargamergirls )
1. imagine a girl, interested into wargaming
2. she goes into store/club
3. Neckbeards stare into her like virgin Mary herself showed up(no offence meant to anyone)
4. girl thinks: Losers/virgins!
5. she runs away, never to be heard of again
So, if you don't wanna spook girls away, try to act like you are not playing against the girl when you are teaching her to play... (more precisely don't ask stuff how come a girl is interested in wargaming and such "sexist" questions)
RANT OVER, BACK TO TOPIC:
I was at 60s/70s party at valentines in a night club, first i bumped into this girl, we made out after like 5 minutes of talk but then i realized afterwards(friend told me to keep an eye on her) she kissed with 5 guys in as many minutes... at that moment i said feth it and carried on, and girl approached me.(we met earlier, she had a friend who i didn't met) anyway, seems like i had achieved something more than a one night stand with her, got her FB, and we are currently talking, and seems like we are going out next weekend... Also, thanks for the advice on yes/no questions
I've seen girls at the local shop and most guys don't approach them. Some are 'nice' to them and others patronise a bit. But they don't try to ask them out because the assumption is that they're always spoken for. I met a girl last year and just got chatting about MtG and we seemed to get along so I asked if I could find her on Facebook. She said yes so later on I contacted her and we chatted a bit and then met up for a couple of dates and got on well. It didn't go further because she wasn't long out of a relationship and preferred not to jump into another too soon, which is fair enough. You can meet girls in game stores but all you have to do is talk to them like normal people and ask them, not treat them like some strange rarity.
The one thing I always do is assume the girl is there to play and buy things for herself. It's just insulting that people assume that girls are just following their boyfriend around or are buying presents, but a lot of people do this including shop staff.
ThatSwellFella wrote: Can someone explain me why i got this feeling that this thread is about Ashiraya not dating.... Seriously she's just a girl who is into 40k and wargaming, no wonder why there are so little wargamer girls(Yea, most of us got or had a GF at some point but, i got this theory why are there so little Wargamergirls )
1. imagine a girl, interested into wargaming
2. she goes into store/club
3. Neckbeards stare into her like virgin Mary herself showed up(no offence meant to anyone)
4. girl thinks: Losers/virgins!
5. she runs away, never to be heard of again
So, if you don't wanna spook girls away, try to act like you are not playing against the girl when you are teaching her to play... (more precisely don't ask stuff how come a girl is interested in wargaming and such "sexist" questions)
This is the fault of both parties really and somewhat exaggerated stupidity. Can get much worse too, try online gaming. Basically picture your scenario and a torrent of D pics and such along side it. XD
Also most clubs don't seem to actually be that awkward, there are a few that are like that but it's not as common as you'd think overall.
No more weird than discussing my, your or anyone elses personal lives. Though to be fair I think everyone else brings up their own personal life rather than a horde descending on dissecting it.
For the record though my ex-wife found it highly strenuous coming into GW stores with me because of the staring, literally made her skin crawl.
I do believe friend-zoning exists, because I've done it. I just don''t think it's a bad thing to not have romantic or sexual interest in a person. I mean seriously, I have girls who I'm friends with and am not interested in, hell I'm still friends with my ex. I think the idea that the whole thing of the 'nice guy" is the idea those types of people seem to have the idea that women are vending machines that you insert nice and receive sex.
it's like the whole thing of "I'll like her facebook things, than she'll fall for me!"
Also, not-u is a girl? call me sexist but suddenly the pink makes sense. no, I kid, I kid.
ThatSwellFella wrote: Can someone explain me why i got this feeling that this thread is about Ashiraya not dating.... Seriously she's just a girl who is into 40k and wargaming, no wonder why there are so little wargamer girls(Yea, most of us got or had a GF at some point but, i got this theory why are there so little Wargamergirls )
1. imagine a girl, interested into wargaming
2. she goes into store/club
3. Neckbeards stare into her like virgin Mary herself showed up(no offence meant to anyone)
4. girl thinks: Losers/virgins!
5. she runs away, never to be heard of again
So, if you don't wanna spook girls away, try to act like you are not playing against the girl when you are teaching her to play... (more precisely don't ask stuff how come a girl is interested in wargaming and such "sexist" questions)
This is the fault of both parties really and somewhat exaggerated stupidity. Can get much worse too, try online gaming. Basically picture your scenario and a torrent of D pics and such along side it. XD
Also most clubs don't seem to actually be that awkward, there are a few that are like that but it's not as common as you'd think overall.
Yup, i have exaggerated a bit in the misunderstanding, but it's more or less like that... And yea, speaking of online gaming, let's just say i called a gamer girl a squeaker while playing counterstrike.....
Automatically Appended Next Post: either way, the girl i met, she can't go this weekend cos she aparently came home in 6.AM (she was supposed to come in 3) and parents grounded her... Not sure if she politely told me to off, but imma fall for it this time and give her a chance.
Thoughts on this?(how many excuses are too much)
ThatSwellFella wrote: Can someone explain me why i got this feeling that this thread is about Ashiraya not dating.... Seriously she's just a girl who is into 40k and wargaming, no wonder why there are so little wargamer girls(Yea, most of us got or had a GF at some point but, i got this theory why are there so little Wargamergirls )
1. imagine a girl, interested into wargaming
2. she goes into store/club
3. Neckbeards stare into her like virgin Mary herself showed up(no offence meant to anyone)
4. girl thinks: Losers/virgins!
5. she runs away, never to be heard of again
So, if you don't wanna spook girls away, try to act like you are not playing against the girl when you are teaching her to play... (more precisely don't ask stuff how come a girl is interested in wargaming and such "sexist" questions)
This is the fault of both parties really and somewhat exaggerated stupidity. Can get much worse too, try online gaming. Basically picture your scenario and a torrent of D pics and such along side it. XD
Also most clubs don't seem to actually be that awkward, there are a few that are like that but it's not as common as you'd think overall.
The truth about the internet is it's a terrible place for everybody in most cases.
In my case i try talking to some girls and act dumb and weird them out but hey i mean it's not like nerdy gamers are the best in social situations. I just suck at them sometimes. That's why i try not to get into anything online these days.
To be fair in my case i have moved to many different parts of the country and had to make new friends frequently and when my mom died in '06 (and i was forced by my jerk of a dad to move) i desperately needed somebody for comfort and support. You wouldn't believe how bad it is when you almost never have somebody to hug no matter how bad things get and they got really bad. In the end i realized i could only really still keep my online friends so between the moving around and the fact i was on the internet often it just seemed like the place to look for women and friends. Sadly looking for a girlfriend online and in a nerdy place is perhaps the worst way to find a girlfriend ever or at least without making really crazy suggestions to find a date.
Also though it sucks for the girls that are gamers or war gamers i find they tend to be in the minority of gamers overall. I'm not suggesting what they do is right but rather it's about numbers. A bunch of socially awkward dudes that never get out and see women see one girl that likes everything they do. I mean imagine girls in a similar situation. I can only think of guys that would somehow like 'twilight' being in the same situation as a war gamer girl.
ThatSwellFella wrote: Can someone explain me why i got this feeling that this thread is about Ashiraya not dating.... Seriously she's just a girl who is into 40k and wargaming, no wonder why there are so little wargamer girls(Yea, most of us got or had a GF at some point but, i got this theory why are there so little Wargamergirls )
1. imagine a girl, interested into wargaming
2. she goes into store/club
3. Neckbeards stare into her like virgin Mary herself showed up(no offence meant to anyone)
4. girl thinks: Losers/virgins!
5. she runs away, never to be heard of again
So, if you don't wanna spook girls away, try to act like you are not playing against the girl when you are teaching her to play... (more precisely don't ask stuff how come a girl is interested in wargaming and such "sexist" questions)
This is the fault of both parties really and somewhat exaggerated stupidity. Can get much worse too, try online gaming. Basically picture your scenario and a torrent of D pics and such along side it. XD
Also most clubs don't seem to actually be that awkward, there are a few that are like that but it's not as common as you'd think overall.
Wait. You mean random girls I play games with online don't appreciate it when I send pictures of penises to them? Gee, never would have guessed!
I'm quite sure that people who do that aren't quite that sane.
ThatSwellFella wrote: Can someone explain me why i got this feeling that this thread is about Ashiraya not dating.... Seriously she's just a girl who is into 40k and wargaming, no wonder why there are so little wargamer girls(Yea, most of us got or had a GF at some point but, i got this theory why are there so little Wargamergirls )
1. imagine a girl, interested into wargaming
2. she goes into store/club
3. Neckbeards stare into her like virgin Mary herself showed up(no offence meant to anyone)
4. girl thinks: Losers/virgins!
5. she runs away, never to be heard of again
So, if you don't wanna spook girls away, try to act like you are not playing against the girl when you are teaching her to play... (more precisely don't ask stuff how come a girl is interested in wargaming and such "sexist" questions)
This is the fault of both parties really and somewhat exaggerated stupidity. Can get much worse too, try online gaming. Basically picture your scenario and a torrent of D pics and such along side it. XD
Also most clubs don't seem to actually be that awkward, there are a few that are like that but it's not as common as you'd think overall.
Wait. You mean random girls I play games with online don't appreciate it when I send pictures of penises to them? Gee, never would have guessed!
I'm quite sure that people who do that aren't quite that sane.
Sadly there's quite a lot that struggle making this very simple connection.
I don't think so. It's perfect for me. The problem is all the people on it.
Automatically Appended Next Post: Wow. It might be oldschool by now. But anyone check out match lately? Seems to be slim pickings in my area and holy crap, everything is screaming at me at all sides for upsells. Thought for a second I'd clicked on a Yahoo page.
Peregrine wrote: The trouble with this argument, besides being kind of awkward, is that it depends on an assumption that there are at least two gamers. In fact, the entire gaming community is nothing more than sub-programs of Peregrine, the god-like AI that runs the universe simulation. Since Peregrine can obviously not be both gay and straight or single and not single, and arguments about half a person don't make any sense, the entire tangent should end here.
So what if Peregrine comes to you and offers you a choice, you can help him and receive the rewards of that lifestyle, or you can suffer bad luck and eternal pain if you choose to doubt his god-like control. In either case, you will never know that these events came from your interaction with Peregrine the god-like AI that runs the universe in the first place and what choice you made. I believe it is called Peregrine's Phoenix.... or something?
Are you trying to arrange it with her? I'd say try about three times (not in quick succession), and if the third doesn't work, ask her to get in touch whenever she's next free. You already made an effort, and if she's interested and was genuinely busy or whatever, then she'll get back in touch. If she doesn't get back to you, then you know she wasn't interested and it's saved you asking and being delayed every time.
DOZENS!
...
Okay, maybe I'm a little less normal than even -ish. >_>
Who cares about normal (well apart from the people you are trying to date of course) monkey man, dakka would certainly be a lot less humourous without you around.
DOZENS!
...
Okay, maybe I'm a little less normal than even -ish. >_>
Who cares about normal (well apart from the people you are trying to date of course) monkey man, dakka would certainly be a lot less humourous without you around.
Oh, I'm not complaining. I like being rather less-than-normal; it's fun.
Albatross wrote: Currently dating a Brazilian girl I met on Tinder.
Manchester Tinder is AWESOME.
I've been told to use tinder. Is it basically a nicer version of a f**k-buddy site? Not that that's bad it's just i dunno if that's all i want. Could be fun for a bit till i want something more serious.
ThatSwellFella wrote: Can someone explain me why i got this feeling that this thread is about Ashiraya not dating
To my knowledge, it's not.
That said, my current lack of dates is more due to 'just can't find anyone that I really like' rather than 'ugh wargamers are disgusting'.
Yes, unwashed gamer kids exist, but so do perfectly normal (ish) people.
It's better not to try to make the group you're looking at too narrow anyways. I know I didn't even bother looking in the wargamer group. Two wargamers together probably can lead to financial issues.
Obviously though stupidity is being with someone who hates some of your favourite hobbys.
Yeah i haven't felt anything really special since that one girl some years ago. Perhaps i should learn more about each person?
@ashiraya: I think you misquoted him but i can't remember. Some guys here probably like you sure but i don't think i do. Too young for me being 27 and that usually brings with it more immaturity and lifestyle differences. For me i have my own place while people your age are just leaving high school or entering college and are finally just experiencing life on your own at a dorm. I also pay bills and have a job. Then there's the distance and the fact you seem too concerned of what other gamers think of you or something. Then again i find many gamers and war-gamers to follow the path of hating shooters even when they're ok and hate something fully even with decent parts to it (i don't like some things but i hate overly-critical people like something has to be a freaking masterpiece every time or an action movie can't be good for people that just want an action movie). Anyway i wouldn't know you well enough to care.
With not_u she's too far away and in a relationship. Not to mention i seem to disagree with many of the things she tends to think.
This is of course just looking at people online here with similar interests though and the pool for us guys is just way too small. Looking in real life is a better idea.
I don't think i'll find any online girls with similar interests to me and a similar connection though you never know.
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I'd prefer a girl that can laugh at things and enjoys humor. Probably a nerdy girl that at least is interested in anime and video games or possibly a girl i can engage with on an intellectual level without either feeling dumb or too smart. Looks would also need to be decent at least. Perhaps even that is asking too much.
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Thankfully i can make girls laugh and stuff but i really should work on taking care of myself and hygiene a bit. Sometimes i won't shave for a couple days and other issues are a problem. I really should fix myself up normally even when i'm mostly just working at a factory or going to GW.
On that topic i find most women that enter GW to just be one of the gamer's girlfriends or a mom. Nothing funnier than somebody that doesn't get a hobby trying to understand it.
"Here are your pokee man things."
At least they try to understand the hobbies. Oh and i hate 'harry potter' and 'pokemon' these days. People that like either one kinda weird me out and same goes for the twilight crowd but being into warhammer i can't judge. Twilight always seemed just like one of those high school drama shows girls used to love back in the day (except with mythical creatures to have sex with). The more things change the more they stay the same i guess.
Too many of the people on here, often times the best way to start a relationship is interaction, so if your on a date, and you are chatting away, think about asking them interesting questions, and then the social queue would probably be to ask you the same questions. Relationships are built and created not from first impressions (Though that is important), people rarely judge you as badly as you would think.
I mean the thing is that many people do not get attracted to the opposite sex or same sex (if you are into that sort of thing), until wam! You meet someone that strikes your fancy. Thats not love at first sight more of an attraction, often times though it is usually gradual once you get to know someone it sometimes heads up the route towards the romantic.
Relationships from my experience are built from casual conversations and discussion.
Interaction is quite key. The few dates I have been on I have connected well, but I don't really have a drive to go any further than a single night and meet someone. Then leave. (no, no one night stands for this guy)
Just to clarify, I am not looking for a date here on Dakka. Too slim odds, and mostly Americans here anyway, so too distant. As for local gaming groups, I really do not expect anything but keeping my eyes open can't hurt.
Or at least on dating sites, not general games/forums/etc, since that avoids the "you're 10,000 miles away and we will never meet" problem.
Asherian Command wrote: Relationships are built and created not from first impressions (Though that is important), people rarely judge you as badly as you would think.
I don't know, I'm pretty judgmental and it doesn't take me that long to form a bad impression of someone. Certainly by the end of a first date I'm going to have a pretty good idea if they're even potentially compatible with me. And given how many first dates in general don't lead to second dates I'd say a lot of people work the same way. That first impression matters a lot. It won't establish a relationship by itself, but it can certainly end one before it even has a chance to begin.
I'm quite sure that looking for a date in real life is better - much better than dating sites/apps too. I mean, this is the internet - people present themselves very differently on the internet than they do in real life.
And let's be serious, asking someone on a date over the internet because you both "like a good glass of wine" is so.. ehh.
thenoobbomb wrote: I'm quite sure that looking for a date in real life is better - much better than dating sites/apps too. I mean, this is the internet - people present themselves very differently on the internet than they do in real life.
You really think people don't lie about themselves offline? At least with online dating you can quickly sort through a large pool of people and filter out the obvious bad matches instead of having to spend a bunch of time in a bar or whatever going through the same "hi, what's your name" stuff. So what if I risk going on a first date with someone who isn't entirely honest, at least I've already avoided wasting any time on the countless other people who will proudly declare that they're not the kind of person I would touch with someone else's ten foot pole.
thenoobbomb wrote: I'm quite sure that looking for a date in real life is better - much better than dating sites/apps too. I mean, this is the internet - people present themselves very differently on the internet than they do in real life.
And let's be serious, asking someone on a date over the internet because you both "like a good glass of wine" is so.. ehh.
thenoobbomb wrote: I'm quite sure that looking for a date in real life is better - much better than dating sites/apps too. I mean, this is the internet - people present themselves very differently on the internet than they do in real life.
And let's be serious, asking someone on a date over the internet because you both "like a good glass of wine" is so.. ehh.
Ashiraya wrote: Just to clarify, I am not looking for a date here on Dakka. Too slim odds, and mostly Americans here anyway, so too distant. As for local gaming groups, I really do not expect anything but keeping my eyes open can't hurt.
Not to mention, if by some miracle you have a relationship long distance that if you fall in love, someone has to uproot themselves.
thenoobbomb wrote: I'm quite sure that looking for a date in real life is better - much better than dating sites/apps too. I mean, this is the internet - people present themselves very differently on the internet than they do in real life.
And let's be serious, asking someone on a date over the internet because you both "like a good glass of wine" is so.. ehh.
Whose saying that?
Literally every single woman on Dutch dating websites, as far as I know.
DOZENS!
...
Okay, maybe I'm a little less normal than even -ish. >_>
Who cares about normal (well apart from the people you are trying to date of course) monkey man, dakka would certainly be a lot less humourous without you around.
Oh, I'm not complaining. I like being rather less-than-normal; it's fun.
me too, sometimes i pretend i am normal, it gets boring quick though...
ThatSwellFella wrote: Can someone explain me why i got this feeling that this thread is about Ashiraya not dating
To my knowledge, it's not.
That said, my current lack of dates is more due to 'just can't find anyone that I really like' rather than 'ugh wargamers are disgusting'.
Yes, unwashed gamer kids exist, but so do perfectly normal (ish) people.
Hah, if you say so, then i am sorry Cos here was a storm because one guy commented the TOs sister on the forums, exactly like this:
Spoiler:
10/10 would bang
and then the club was recalling this girl who left since people were always staring into her and she was fed up by swearing one's entire bloodline/deities when one would roll disastrously etc etc... TBH, I don't get the 2nd part(prolly since i do the same, have bad temper and even worse luck LoL) but yea, as a guy(correct me if i am wrong ashiraya, or any gamer girl reading this) i get this feeling that if we wanna atract girls to the hobby, teach her to play as if it was a guy you are teaching(but without sexist jokes and such ) fun fact, my friend from club tried it and managed to get a girl into WHFB.... BACK TO TOPIC AGAIN: apparently, girl i met last Saturday contacted me(yea, not the other way around, imma take it as a good sign) and said that she is trying to persuade her parents to let her go this saturday.... Wish me/her luck but enough about me,
Spoiler:
let's talk about my car (JK)
you guys and girls How is your weekend going, and how you plan to spend it?
ThatSwellFella wrote: i get this feeling that if we wanna atract girls to the hobby, teach her to play as if it was a guy you are teaching(but without sexist jokes and such )
Well, that is what I would do by default. And I do not do sexist jokes even when teaching a guy. Or, like, ever, actually, I guess.
Good for you though Ash. You may not have benefited directly from this thread but it seems that, the manner in which your chap eventually approached you mirrors some of the other stories people have posted up here. Interesting.
Ashiraya wrote: Not directly, but it helps me understand men, which never hurts.
You're quite strange creatures, you know.
I don't think so. I think it's the women who are weird.
I suppose it wouldn't be much of a problem if they were just straightforward. Perhaps many are too afraid to hurt guy's feelings and never tell them they're not interested? I dunno.
Given the irrational or aggressive way some men handle rejection it's no wonder women play it safe and do it in a manner that isn't blunt and direct. Also if they are very direct they can be accused of being a harsh bitch.
Usually rejection is clear, you don't need it spelt out unless you really can't read people or situations.
Gogsnik wrote: I think most people are pretty bloody strange.
Good for you though Ash. You may not have benefited directly from this thread but it seems that, the manner in which your chap eventually approached you mirrors some of the other stories people have posted up here. Interesting.
Gogsnik wrote: I think most people are pretty bloody strange.
Good for you though Ash. You may not have benefited directly from this thread but it seems that, the manner in which your chap eventually approached you mirrors some of the other stories people have posted up here. Interesting.
Ashiraya wrote: Not directly, but it helps me understand men, which never hurts.
You're quite strange creatures, you know.
I don't think so. I think it's the women who are weird.
I suppose it wouldn't be much of a problem if they were just straightforward. Perhaps many are too afraid to hurt guy's feelings and never tell them they're not interested? I dunno.
It's the different perspectives that makes the other seem weird. So everyone here is.
Howard A Treesong wrote: Given the irrational or aggressive way some men handle rejection it's no wonder women play it safe and do it in a manner that isn't blunt and direct. Also if they are very direct they can be accused of being a harsh bitch.
Usually rejection is clear, you don't need it spelt out unless you really can't read people or situations.
Not for me. When one girl i spoke to was honest and straightforward and said she felt no connection i had the utmost respect for her. In fact what she did was very genuine and decent and i don't see enough women do so. So yeah what she did i have total respect for. I only wish more women did that.
I'm rather disgusted by some of the ***holes and douches i've seen dating women though (the ones that treat women like sh*t and like b*tches). I think those women sometimes come with their own brand of problems (some are terrible themselves and do a similar thing to men 'douchettes' if you will) and the dudes that look for them don't look too hard. All that said it bothers me that these jerks even if they are often good looking get all these women. You know maybe people are trying to be nice and some feel disgusted there's something attached to it but honestly i don't. I'd rather be with somebody that treats me well in comparison to a person that treats me like crap. Normally though i try to go for honesty these days as hard as it can be. I'll admit sometimes attractive women have a hypnotic effect on me and other people that might be interested. Anybody ever see the south park episode of "bebe's boobs destroy society"? It's kind of like that. Sometimes an attractive person can stupefy people interested in that gender.
People are weird. They do weird stuff all the time!
flamingkillamajig wrote: I suppose it wouldn't be much of a problem if they were just straightforward.
Of course if everyone was always straightforward, everything would be much simpler. Anyhow, I do not feel like men are more straightforward than women.
I went on a date yesterday (lasted about 2 hours) at a Bubble Tea place, I feel things went alright she seemed to be laughing a lot and smiling, she sat in a crossed position with her top leg facing me occasional touching my foot, she also had some confusing body language such as
crossing her arms for a moment (a nervous, defensive gesture) but she was leaning towards me as she was doing it (implying interest), we both talked roughly the same amount (I might have said a few more things but I talk a lot in general), we both said a few awkward things but for the
most I had a good time and I hope she did too. Also before the date and the beginning of the date (I built up confidence as we began conversing more) I was a nervous mess my back was sweating, I had skid marks on my underwear, dry mouth, excessive peeing, butterflies in my stomach,
lack of appetite, etc is there anyway to combat anxiety like this or is experience the only way? Also I'm thinking of waiting about a week to see if she replies, don't know if that's a good idea or not.
The whole 'crossing arms is a defensive gesture' thing has always sounded like complete rubbish to me; crossing my arms is a matter of personal comfort, and the only thing anyone should take away from the fact I'm doing it is that I wanted to be in a more comfortable position, and rest my arms.
Personally, I'd say ignore it.
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Cheesecat wrote: I was a nervous mess my back was sweating, I had skid marks on my underwear, dry mouth, excessive peeing, butterflies in my stomach,
lack of appetite, etc is there anyway to combat anxiety like this or is experience the only way? Also I'm thinking of waiting about a week to see if she replies, don't know if that's a good idea or not.
Sweating is normal, as is dry mouth, and the more frequent urge to urinate + butterflies and a lack of appetite, and if I knew how to combat anxiety outside of medication, I wouldn't be in the personal mess I am today.
The skid marks, however, are simply a sign of not wiping thoroughly after going #2.
You're probably right and I'm just over thinking things, I mean if the rest of the content from my date sounds positive it seems likely that the experience was mostly positive.
Since I got stood up I can't help feeling as if I'm failing at this whole thing, reading the signs and everything. And that I'm just never going too get a girl.
I find a pretty great irony in all the things I hear about gamer girls being impossible to get as girlfriends due to competition and when I finally become one, my man isn't even a hobbyist at all!
He is a fan of IG, though, even though he doesn't actively take part in the hobby. Poor guy to be stuck with an OP-Astartes-nutter, eh?
Ashiraya wrote: I find a pretty great irony in all the things I hear about gamer girls being impossible to get as girlfriends due to competition and when I finally become one, my man isn't even a hobbyist at all!
He is a fan of IG, though, even though he doesn't actively take part in the hobby. Poor guy to be stuck with an OP-Astartes-nutter, eh?
Gamer Girls are....an interesting idea TBH.
I mean, Think about it, I personally dont want a gamer girl, I want a girl who accepts my gaming and may partake in it.
And the guys who go "All I want is a gamer girl and one who is eactly like me" are not the ones you wanna date, while the guys who you do, dont look for amer girls
Ashiraya wrote: Not directly, but it helps me understand men, which never hurts.
You're quite strange creatures, you know.
lemme tell you something: A man from Europe wanted god to make him a bridge from EU to Hawaii, since he was scared flying in planes, and he always felt sick in ships. Then god explains him that is impossible to do because obvious reasons(depth of the atlantic AND pacific, winds....)
Then, a man asks god the following: I want to understand the way women think, when they are joking amd when they are serious and how to make them happy.
God: *Sigh* OK, do you want a 2 or 4 track bridge???
Ashiraya wrote: I find a pretty great irony in all the things I hear about gamer girls being impossible to get as girlfriends due to competition and when I finally become one, my man isn't even a hobbyist at all!
He is a fan of IG, though, even though he doesn't actively take part in the hobby. Poor guy to be stuck with an OP-Astartes-nutter, eh?
Not really. It's not impossible for them to get boyfriends (in fact it's rather likely) but it's impossibly hard for guys to be their boyfriends. It's a numbers thing.
Anyway i think i'll stop looking for gamer girls myself. It's just not worth it. Perhaps at most just a girl that likes video games. Maybe just a girl i connect with would be enough.
Ashiraya wrote: He is a fan of IG, though, even though he doesn't actively take part in the hobby. Poor guy to be stuck with an OP-Astartes-nutter, eh?
Does this mean that, for the sake of peace in your relationship, you will be backing off from your previous claims of marine superiority and accepting their true place as cannon fodder for the LBRTs? Relationships are all about compromise, and what better place to start?
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flamingkillamajig wrote: Anyway i think i'll stop looking for gamer girls myself. It's just not worth it. Perhaps at most just a girl that likes video games. Maybe just a girl i connect with would be enough.
This is the right approach. Superficial things like which games a person plays don't mean much for compatibility. It's a nice bonus if you have that particular thing in common, but as long as you have something to share the most important thing is that they understand and accept your hobbies, even if they don't participate in them with you.
Huh i thought ashiraya was a sisters fan. I'd imagine their codex creep is ridiculous by now.
I actually think i'm gonna try going for girls that don't get a new boyfriend too quickly. There's something about people that have too many friends or lovers that seems to give a lowered value on their worth for those people. It's just not worth it to love somebody to death and having them consider you worth as much as a tissue they blow into that can be replaced at any time. I figure if i want somebody said person would have to have fairly long relationships (normally last about 9 months or more) that they actually put serious effort into. Perhaps also it'd be better if they weren't always being taken by guys. Just basically somebody that cares about who they are with and is honest enough about how they're feeling.
flamingkillamajig wrote: Huh i thought ashiraya was a sisters fan. I'd imagine their codex creep is ridiculous by now.
I actually think i'm gonna try going for girls that don't get a new boyfriend too quickly. There's something about people that have too many friends or lovers that seems to give a lowered value on their worth for those people. It's just not worth it to love somebody to death and having them consider you worth as much as a tissue they blow into that can be replaced at any time. I figure if i want somebody said person would have to have fairly long relationships (normally last about 9 months or more) that they actually put serious effort into. Perhaps also it'd be better if they weren't always being taken by guys. Just basically somebody that cares about who they are with and is honest enough about how they're feeling.
This may not mean a whole lot coming from me, but just try and find someone you like. Dont end up like me.
flamingkillamajig wrote: I actually think i'm gonna try going for girls that don't get a new boyfriend too quickly. There's something about people that have too many friends or lovers that seems to give a lowered value on their worth for those people. It's just not worth it to love somebody to death and having them consider you worth as much as a tissue they blow into that can be replaced at any time. I figure if i want somebody said person would have to have fairly long relationships (normally last about 9 months or more) that they actually put serious effort into. Perhaps also it'd be better if they weren't always being taken by guys. Just basically somebody that cares about who they are with and is honest enough about how they're feeling.
You're making a big mistake by assuming that average length of relationship is the same as level of caring about those relationships. Yeah, there are some people who turn serial monogamy into a self-destructive thing, but you really have to know WHY those relationships were short. Were they short because the other people did things to end it? Was your potential person of interest in casual FWB-type relationships that everyone involved was happy with? If it's something like that then having lots of short relationships doesn't mean they aren't capable of commitment.
Alternatively, you might want to consider that there isn't some linear scale of relationship value with casual sex at the bottom and marriage until death at the top. Short-term or casual relationships can have value if that's what everyone wants. It's ok to want certain things in your own relationships, but you seem to be crossing the line into declaring that anyone who doesn't commit to serious long-term monogamy is a bad person.
flamingkillamajig wrote: I actually think i'm gonna try going for girls that don't get a new boyfriend too quickly. There's something about people that have too many friends or lovers that seems to give a lowered value on their worth for those people. It's just not worth it to love somebody to death and having them consider you worth as much as a tissue they blow into that can be replaced at any time. I figure if i want somebody said person would have to have fairly long relationships (normally last about 9 months or more) that they actually put serious effort into. Perhaps also it'd be better if they weren't always being taken by guys. Just basically somebody that cares about who they are with and is honest enough about how they're feeling.
You're making a big mistake by assuming that average length of relationship is the same as level of caring about those relationships. Yeah, there are some people who turn serial monogamy into a self-destructive thing, but you really have to know WHY those relationships were short. Were they short because the other people did things to end it? Was your potential person of interest in casual FWB-type relationships that everyone involved was happy with? If it's something like that then having lots of short relationships doesn't mean they aren't capable of commitment.
Alternatively, you might want to consider that there isn't some linear scale of relationship value with casual sex at the bottom and marriage until death at the top. Short-term or casual relationships can have value if that's what everyone wants. It's ok to want certain things in your own relationships, but you seem to be crossing the line into declaring that anyone who doesn't commit to serious long-term monogamy is a bad person.
Not really as long as they're honest about it. I'm just saying the ones that have very short term relationships (without being honest about what they want) and give low value to their friends and lovers are not worth being around.
Nah. Really not. We get into constant astartes versus sororitas debates in the Background section, and it started back when she was Brother Something, Haraldus maybe . I am the Sisters fan.
For anyone wondering (no-one was, I guess), the climbing was quite nice. I love to teach new people to climb. I will likely die when one of them fail to belay me properly . Also, I like cooking for people. I made a gratin de ravioles, this time. With a few mushroom, but not much because I left them for too long in the frying pan.
I got her pretty tired, I guess. She sent me a text saying that she was unable to even peel a banana now . She needs more training! But the previous one put the bar pretty damn high.
Hybrid Son Of Oxayotl wrote: I made a gratin de ravioles, this time. With a few mushroom, but not much because I left them for too long in the frying pan.
This put the idea of a Dakka Cook Book into my head and made me smile. On the subject of mushrooms I've gone off fried mushrooms, always find them to be a too greasy/oily but I find them delicious raw and I don't think many people eat them that way.
I was also going to ask if Ash's new chap was into 40K and I am not surprised that he isn't overly. I think that could be the problem with the whole 'gamer girl' concept, especially since many more girls play games these days anyway it's less 'gamer girl' and more 'just another person who plays games for fun'; or are these gamer girls in the same category as full on hardcore gamers (who I would think of as male)? I play games for entertainment but would not consider myself a gamer per se and the gamer fanatics don't make much sense to me, not because of what they like but the intensity of it, especially when people start referring to their computer as a 'rig'.
Hybrid Son Of Oxayotl wrote: Nah. Really not. We get into constant astartes versus sororitas debates in the Background section, and it started back when she was Brother Something, Haraldus maybe . I am the Sisters fan.
Peregrine wrote: Does this mean that, for the sake of peace in your relationship, you will be backing off from your previous claims of marine superiority and accepting their true place as cannon fodder for the LBRTs? Relationships are all about compromise, and what better place to start?
If I can survive you two nutters, I can survive my boyfriend refusing to accept the Astartes' rightful position as the demigod rambos of the setting. (Marbo's gone, remember?)
That said, I think our differences actually makes it more interesting. Someone whose interests do not match perfectly with yours gives you a different view, and it might even introduce you to a hobby, activity or preference you would not otherwise have considered.
This is the right approach. Superficial things like which games a person plays don't mean much for compatibility. It's a nice bonus if you have that particular thing in common, but as long as you have something to share the most important thing is that they understand and accept your hobbies, even if they don't participate in them with you.
Entirely correct. The problem with looking for 'gamer partners' is that you narrow down their important qualities to a hobby that's honestly a rather minor aspect, in the grand scheme of things. What matters most is if you feel you fit. If you could fall in love with someone without ever seeing their face, but rather simply due to their demanour and personality, you two will work.
Entirely correct. The problem with looking for 'gamer partners' is that you narrow down their important qualities to a hobby that's honestly a rather minor aspect, in the grand scheme of things. What matters most is if you feel you fit. If you could fall in love with someone without ever seeing their face, but rather simply due to their demanour and personality, you two will work.
Alot of guys i know got their GF into stuff like D&D and RPGs....but they didnt start that way.
Gogsnik wrote: I was also going to ask if Ash's new chap was into 40K and I am not surprised that he isn't overly. I think that could be the problem with the whole 'gamer girl' concept, especially since many more girls play games these days anyway it's less 'gamer girl' and more 'just another person who plays games for fun'; or are these gamer girls in the same category as full on hardcore gamers (who I would think of as male)?
The first time I met him was actually a few years ago in World of Warcraft, when he joined my roleplaying guild. At the time he had another girlfriend and while he quickly rose to an officer position in the guild, he never really appeared that extraordinary at first. But when he eventually quit the game, we never lost contact, and over the years there are few people I've talked with more.
Now that I have seen his face and heard his voice, I am honestly incredibly satisfied. Saying that he is super-attractive in the traditional sense would not be true, but I am in love with his personality and that is what matters to me.
Gogsnik wrote: I was also going to ask if Ash's new chap was into 40K and I am not surprised that he isn't overly. I think that could be the problem with the whole 'gamer girl' concept, especially since many more girls play games these days anyway it's less 'gamer girl' and more 'just another person who plays games for fun'; or are these gamer girls in the same category as full on hardcore gamers (who I would think of as male)?
The first time I met him was actually a few years ago in World of Warcraft, when he joined my roleplaying guild. At the time he had another girlfriend and while he quickly rose to an officer position in the guild, he never really appeared that extraordinary at first. But when he eventually quit the game, we never lost contact, and over the years there are few people I've talked with more.
Now that I have seen his face and heard his voice, I am honestly incredibly satisfied. Saying that he is super-attractive in the traditional sense would not be true, but I am in love with his personality and that is what matters to me.
Man, All the girls I met in WoW where really guys.....
Gogsnik wrote: This put the idea of a Dakka Cook Book into my head and made me smile.
I can give recipes for gratin and lasagna. And, uh, pasta? Plain rice?
Gogsnik wrote: On the subject of mushrooms I've gone off fried mushrooms, always find them to be a too greasy/oily but I find them delicious raw and I don't think many people eat them that way.
Greasy is nice. Especially in gratin .
Honestly, I would rather have a girlfriend that share my tastes for weird movies than for wargaming or video games. Not sure why, though. But spending a night watching B-movies at a festival seems a much better romantic activity than spending a night playing Strife or Warmachine.
Now that I am taken, I think that means I am free to mention something without it risking becoming awkward. (Especially since it is, in essence, praise). Someone may find it useful or interesting.
Peregrine might have gathered himself a mixed reputation due to his strong opinions and complete lack of fear for displaying them, but if you want to appear attractive in the way you behave and word yourself online, he is doing basically everything right. Having very firm and logical opinions, incredibly no-nonsense (even if almost a bit too blunt sometimes) and never far from the action but, as displayed in certain... less pleasant threads, also having a good heart! Quite mysterious as well (I know very little about him outside of Dakka). In essence, the way he is behaving hits all the right buttons to draw attention like a fire alarm without appearing as though he's even remotely trying to do so. The way he gets smackdowned in various threads for his opinions almost makes you feel sorry for him, and simultaneously he acts like he has the willpower of a stone wall. 10/10.
Yes, I am a Peregrine fangirl. Bite me. Hopefully I won't get banned for talking about another poster.
Now for something a bit less personal, I am quite interested in game demographics and during my years of WoW I have asked people I encounter various questions (simultaneously stressing that I don't expect them to answer if they don't want to). I am not surprised I find myself quite attracted to WoW as my taste in games have never been very feminine, but I am surprised by the sheer number of other women I've found in that game, and I am still not entirely sure why the gender ratio in that game/genre is so much more equal than in most other games with a that high focus on violence. During my days of CoD4 I felt like the only female on the planet.
Man, All the girls I met in WoW where really guys.....
If it is a female Tauren, the odds are something like 90% or more that it's a girl behind the screen. Male trolls, draenei and female orcs are also quite popular. And Pandaren!
If it is a female Blood Elf in a metal bikini, a male orc or Tauren, the odds are reversed.
@Ashiraya: Well i'm a guy so i'm not effected by his charms and i usually disagree with him (and i think it depends on the woman rather than ashiraya here being seen as every woman). I feel sometimes peregrine is alright but some of his opinions seem a little too extreme. His opinion of never saying hello to somebody you don't know was a bit much for me as well as his opinion that if you just lost your family member that somebody not knowing you asking you to keep your head up or similar deserved a punch in the face. In fact having gone through that situation i'd say people helping you is a big deal. I felt really alone when my mom died so i can say for me and in my experience with the situation what i really needed was family, friends and anybody that would care. Didn't help not long after my dad forced me to move in with my half sister and not very long after sold the family dog. Sure this was all when i was 19 but for a fairly young person it's a lot to go through. Could you imagine going through all this about right now ashiraya. I had to at about your age. In case you're wondering my mom died of ovarian cancer and suffered for at least 3 months on a constant case of lowering and stabilizing health that saddened and relieved you constantly until you were emotionally dead inside. It was not fun.
flamingkillamajig wrote: @Ashiraya: Well i'm a guy so i'm not effected by his charms and i usually disagree with him (and i think it depends on the woman rather than ashiraya here being seen as every woman)
Well obviously my perspective does not speak for everyone, but I imagined someone might find it interesting to know how that kind of behaviour is viewed by someone on the other side of the border.
flamingkillamajig wrote: @Ashiraya: Well i'm a guy so i'm not effected by his charms and i usually disagree with him (and i think it depends on the woman rather than ashiraya here being seen as every woman)
Well obviously my perspective does not speak for everyone, but I imagined someone might be interesting to know how that kind of behaviour is viewed by someone on the other side of the border.
Fair enough and i added a bit more to what i said as you posted that so you might want to re-read my old post i was editing.
Ashiraya wrote: The majority of us are probably a fair bit nicer in real life than online. Lowered inhibitions tends to do that.
I can't comment on the occasion you mention as I have not followed that discussion.
0
Im probably not. Im a jerk in general. Atleast people say I am. But several say im nice and have a quiet demeanor.
People usually insult me more online. I think it depends. I think the major problem is i joke with people and tease them but can't take a joke meant to tease me at times (usually they don't do such in a humorous way whereas i do or possibly the idea we were joking was not understood). In every other way most people seem to be good with me. There does seem to be a great bunch of *ssholes and douchebags though. Not saying i'm great either but there are a lot of people that are bullies and (at least in my opinion) and much worse than me.
Oddly enough on dakka dakka possibly because i'm not heavily invested in the site and the bond between members isn't so close (often on smaller forums people are closer) i have found myself getting a lot less hate. I think there's only a couple people on this site that hate me or rub shoulders with me. I tend to find people that do are the overly-serious bunch that can't take a joke. For instance as a joke last week at work i told a co-worker if he ever knew a woman that played the harmonica with her q*eefs. We both thought it was pretty funny. A serious person probably wouldn't though.
I wish some girls here were super fond of me in the way ashiraya was with peregrine. Hopefully i can find a girl that enjoys humor. I also think i'd prefer a girl that isn't too innocent. Perhaps one that likes fun but isn't a party girl. We'll have to see.
I think Ive been ruined for all women (or something like that). It happened by accident, bullshitting about hockey in a facebook group where I became acquainted with a Canadian girl, we talked a bit bout a plethora of different topics. She is like, literally perfect (for me) in every way possible. Great personality, super interesting, super polite (but arent all Canadians? ), etc etc etc ad nauseum, and my fething god is she beautiful, like words cannot describe, Im still trying to pick my jaw up off the floor. This was like 2 weeks ago (havent spoken to her since, we arent friends or anything, just random strangers who had a chat about common interests), since then, I have not seen a girl that triggered any sort of emotional/physical/attraction response in me whatsoever. Like, at all.
There were a couple girls I had intended to message on okcupid, and now im like "nah". I had to delete my Tinder because I caught myself just endlessly swiping left on every girl I saw. Restarted my account, and then just went back to swiping left before I deleted it again and decided to take a step back. I thought, oh maybe its just a momentary fancy, itll pass with time... but seriously, 2 weeks and I basically have no interest whatsoever in women anymore (except that Canadian chick, which is pretty much a nonoption for fairly obvious reasons).
Other than that, not much goin on. Been dealin with some pretty confusing signals from a friend of mine whonrecently entered a long distance relationship with someone else, not really sure whats up with that. Shes been kind of a huge bitch to me since then, particularly whenever I tell her I cant hang out (as in if she invites me out somewhere/over to hang our at her place, etc and I tell her I cant she gives me a ton of gak about it every time, but we get along great otherwise when we are hanging out, although there was that one time I had to bail out on a party early and she just would not stop giving me gak as I left, even messaging me afterwards to try to make me feel bad for leaving.
Other confusing signals from another girl who ive only relatively recently met, she has a bf (really cool guy too) she keeps hitting me up to hang out n whatnot and has been almost excessively friendly towards me, not sure whats up with that either, particularly since Im her best friends "gay friend" (even though she openly admitted to me she would sleep with me if the opportunity came up, not interested).
And beyond that, well... meh. So disinterested in all that gak recently, its as if Im all out of feths to give. I think a large part of it has to do with the fact that im unemployed and living with my parents, situation isnt necessarily conducive to relationships/getting laid, and I have bigger concerns on my mind, like why my interview for my dream job keeps getting pushed back and how im going to pay my bills for the next month.
flamingkillamajig wrote: I wish some girls here were super fond of me in the way ashiraya was with peregrine.
Ok, lesson here: I don't have some secret "make women like me" attribute, it's just pure luck. For every person that's "super fond" of me there's at least a few that hate me. And plenty of them are members of this forum. But apparently the population here is large enough for there to be at least a couple that don't. So if you want someone to feel that way about you then go meet more people until you find someone that does.
Hopefully i can find a girl that enjoys humor.
...
Perhaps one that likes fun
And here's another hint: everyone enjoys humor and likes fun, so looking for that isn't very useful. When you're listing the things you're looking for it's best to start with the ones that do the best job of splitting people into distinct "like" and "don't like" groups. Those are going to be the things that make you different from all the other people. All the other stuff like "I enjoy having fun" is just useless fluff that tells you nothing about what a person is like or whether you'd be a good match for them.
flamingkillamajig wrote: I wish some girls here were super fond of me in the way ashiraya was with peregrine.
Ok, lesson here: I don't have some secret "make women like me" attribute, it's just pure luck. For every person that's "super fond" of me there's at least a few that hate me*. And plenty of them are members of this forum. But apparently the population here is large enough for there to be at least a couple that don't. So if you want someone to feel that way about you then go meet more people until you find someone that does.
This, the secret is just meeting enough people to play with those odds basically.
I'm a little confused I'm getting signals that's she's into me like rubbing my face with a finger condom, helping out on my side of that station, or bringing up details about my date at work, yet there is this guy who for anonymous sake we'll call "blank" that I've seen driving her around or hanging
out (a few times) and I remember in a conversation (a month or two earlier) her saying "I can't believe I called blank a friend" (implying either he's a boyfriend or they aren't friends no more), she's also will occasionally talk about the handsome black co-worker, so I don't know if she's being
flirtatious with me or if there's genuine interest.
Well.
I recently spoke with a girl I am pretty sure (like 99 percent I've spoken with a friend of hers and she's told my sisters) so might see how that goes, tho I don't plan on maiking any "moves.
ps, today I wore welding goggles to school.
pps, the school's religious nutcase is into me.
ppps, My ex is talking gak about me on facebook .
If it is a female Tauren, the odds are something like 90% or more that it's a girl behind the screen. Male trolls, draenei and female orcs are also quite popular. And Pandaren!
If it is a female Blood Elf in a metal bikini, a male orc or Tauren, the odds are reversed.
There are quite some trends!
Interesting, but in one of my classes we did a trend study that showed women to be attracted to the elves. With the pandarens being the last race women tend to play.
But eh trend studies are usually all over the place.
Also was told to wait by a girlfriend of the girl I am asking out . Kind of worried something might of happened.
If it is a female Tauren, the odds are something like 90% or more that it's a girl behind the screen. Male trolls, draenei and female orcs are also quite popular. And Pandaren!
If it is a female Blood Elf in a metal bikini, a male orc or Tauren, the odds are reversed.
There are quite some trends!
Interesting, but in one of my classes we did a trend study that showed women to be attracted to the elves. With the pandarens being the last race women tend to play.
But eh trend studies are usually all over the place.
Also was told to wait by a girlfriend of the girl I am asking out . Kind of worried something might of happened.
Pretty much all elves in any lore deserve to burn in a fire. Since they're made up i can totally say that. I haven't seen elves in any lore which haven't been smug, arrogant, self-righteous, racist and usually on the brink of extinction even though their arrogance tends to look passed inconvenient truths right in front of their eyes. So in general elves suck and until somebody writes an elf i like i will continue to hate them. Female elves are a bit better but the male elves are just overly feminine.
If it is a female Tauren, the odds are something like 90% or more that it's a girl behind the screen. Male trolls, draenei and female orcs are also quite popular. And Pandaren!
If it is a female Blood Elf in a metal bikini, a male orc or Tauren, the odds are reversed.
There are quite some trends!
Interesting, but in one of my classes we did a trend study that showed women to be attracted to the elves. With the pandarens being the last race women tend to play.
But eh trend studies are usually all over the place.
Also was told to wait by a girlfriend of the girl I am asking out . Kind of worried something might of happened.
Pretty much all elves in any lore deserve to burn in a fire. Since they're made up i can totally say that. I haven't seen elves in any lore which haven't been smug, arrogant, self-righteous, racist and usually on the brink of extinction even though their arrogance tends to look passed inconvenient truths right in front of their eyes. So in general elves suck and until somebody writes an elf i like i will continue to hate them. Female elves are a bit better but the male elves are just overly feminine.
Huh. Elf hater much?
Hmm. I think that most elves are crap, unless otherwise written not to be.
Considering many elves even in tolkiens world are not feminine in structure.
As are many other species.
I mean look at the elves in Warcraft, they are quite huge and well built.
BREAKING NEWS:
Can't date girl, something is going on in her life. I have to back off for a bit.
Ashiraya wrote: Spoilered due to a highly tangential matter.
Spoiler:
Those are definitely people you'd mistake for women at a glance, yeah?
Spoiler:
No facial hair→ feminine. But apparently on the first illustration that elf has a tiny bit of facial hair, so he just looks androgynous instead of feminine. .
Actually it is not a matter of masculine or feminine. It is more about subtlety and intricacies or brute force and bawdiness. We just tend to (wrongly) associate the first with “femininity” and the second with “masculinity”. And Elves tends toward the former, while dwarfs/orcs tends toward the latter. Given the general WOW setting, yeah, those elves do not exude the same sense of brutality and savagery that an orc, or a troll, or a tauren would. Or even most humans. Of course, in another setting…
That elf you showed has long flowing golden hair and not much body hair so in a sense he's still a pretty boy elf (or at least in the 2nd picture).
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To be fair i do kind of like dark eldar but for the most part most elves are kind of crap.
I'm just so glad i get to punch the thalmor in the face in skyrim.
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On to the dating side of things i don't think i have done much in actual searching. The conclusions i came to about finding a girl that i have an emotional connection with may have helped though for later.
Hybrid Son Of Oxayotl wrote: So you do not like elves because their make you uncomfortable with your sexual orientation .
No i hate elves for multiple reasons but that's just one. As i said they're arrogant, racist (believe their race to be the best), the general nature they exude of being better than you even though they couldn't take a hit in a fistfight and finally the girly nature. If you don't hear an elf talking emo about something or singing a very flamboyant song while playing his lute then you're not in elf territory. Oh and wood elves are hippies.
I cannot really help you with that one, but I guess you need to do something about it and start to find a way to accept it better. Maybe someone else in the thread can help you with that?
Please take the time to deconstruct those kind of gender stereotypes. Stop and consider what you think is girly about them, like I did a few post above, and then use the adjectives that directly qualifies what they are that annoy you rather than diss on girls .
I cannot really help you with that one, but I guess you need to do something about it and start to find a way to accept it better. Maybe someone else in the thread can help you with that?
Please take the time to deconstruct those kind of gender stereotypes. Stop and consider what you think is girly about them, like I did a few post above, and then use the adjectives that directly qualifies what they are that annoy you rather than diss on girls .
It's mostly just their flamboyant nature and more the fact they look feminine in features.
This is a fantasy race we're talking about. It's not that bad to hate a made up race of people that are always written the same way rather than a species or race that has many different types and they all act differently given time and cultural change.
Girls are cool and i'm not dissing on them. I'm more just weirded out when guys look kind of like girls. It's more in line with the pretty boy hate that everybody used to do when leonardo di caprio was younger or 'The Beatles' in the 60's. Do i prefer macho men to an extent? Yes. That said a lot of them i do not like as well. I suppose it's a matter of how far they go with it. On one hand some overly masculine guys can be jerks whereas pretty metrosexual boys just make me feel a little weird (not attracted).
At least i get why 'twilight' girls like what they like. It's basically about an average girl getting her man hunk that loves her unquestioningly for some reason even though he could have anybody. It's no different than plenty of shows with a male as the protagonist. I mean why would a pretty perfect girl want them.
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Anyway we're probably going mostly off-topic here so somebody get things back on point.
Ashiraya wrote: Now that I am taken, I think that means I am free to mention something without it risking becoming awkward. (Especially since it is, in essence, praise). Someone may find it useful or interesting.
Peregrine might have gathered himself a mixed reputation due to his strong opinions and complete lack of fear for displaying them, but if you want to appear attractive in the way you behave and word yourself online, he is doing basically everything right. Having very firm and logical opinions, incredibly no-nonsense (even if almost a bit too blunt sometimes) and never far from the action but, as displayed in certain... less pleasant threads, also having a good heart! Quite mysterious as well (I know very little about him outside of Dakka). In essence, the way he is behaving hits all the right buttons to draw attention like a fire alarm without appearing as though he's even remotely trying to do so. The way he gets smackdowned in various threads for his opinions almost makes you feel sorry for him, and simultaneously he acts like he has the willpower of a stone wall. 10/10.
Yes, I am a Peregrine fangirl. Bite me. Hopefully I won't get banned for talking about another poster.
So abrasive is attractive? That's 1-up for bullockist... now to go train my inner donkey-cave
That's okay Hybrid, no need to go to any trouble for me. I'm actually quite a good cook as it happens although, if I go to any great trouble ordinarily it will be to make a cake or some such thing (not sure if I'll be bothering with the filo pastry again, very laborious and still ended up full of holes).
I feel a bit responsible here for that. I mean i mentioned elves and then bam.
Anyway i think my revelation with the ladies i should go for has helped. I should focus on the good ones first rather than the gamers. It's best to be treated well first i should think.
Hybrid Son Of Oxayotl wrote: I mostly do main dishes. I do not think I even know how to make a good cake. I will usually buy ice-cream.
Cake is hard, it's cooking where you have to have the chemistry part right and i hate it, it's just so unintuitive. Which is what i like about cooking.
and ash, your determined is my abrasive, not saying i Mind peregrine just that well he can come off as quite abrasive. My fave peregrine quote "I only post when I'm right...." just like the rest of us buddy. Well cept maybe me , i usually post when i have something stupid to say.
Hybrid Son Of Oxayotl wrote: I mostly do main dishes. I do not think I even know how to make a good cake. I will usually buy ice-cream.
Cake is hard, it's cooking where you have to have the chemistry part right and i hate it, it's just so unintuitive. Which is what i like about cooking.
and ash, your determined is my abrasive, not saying i Mind peregrine just that well he can come off as quite abrasive. My fave peregrine quote "I only post when I'm right...." just like the rest of us buddy. Well cept maybe me , i usually post when i have something stupid to say.
Yes well some other people are abrasive too on this forum. Not sure if i can say who due to mods. I have been temp banned just for talking too much about a specific person even though for once i agreed with them in most respects and didn't insult except maybe once with a very mild insult.
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For me all the cooking i know is usually pasta based (spaghetti, lasagna and not much else) as well as using a slow cooker. Everything else is prepared food usually.
If you guys would like to go for a cooking thread or throw up some suggestions then go ahead.
I also can't help but laugh at the idea of think of Hybrid as a French cook that's very snobbish or something. I almost wonder how he'd take it if i used steak sauce on his food. I hear some cooks consider that a big insult when done on their steaks. That said something tells me he is more of a vegetarian but i am unsure.
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Sheesh ashiraya why didn't you just go for peregrine if that was the case. Also keep in mind you're a grand total of 18 years old. Even if the age gap and massive distance between the two of you didn't get in the way then i'm sure your inexperience probably would. Not saying i have experience either but i have probably talked to a bunch of women and found out some things.
flamingkillamajig wrote: I also can't help but laugh at the idea of think of Hybrid as a French cook that's very snobbish or something. I almost wonder how he'd take it if i used steak sauce on his food. I hear some cooks consider that a big insult when done on their steaks. That said something tells me he is more of a vegetarian but i am unsure.
I am indeed a vegetarian. I would just go out buy myself a veggie burger .
But I am not a snobbish cook, I go for simple, filling dishes. Just do not put ketchup on pasta and we will be alright .
Yes well some other people are abrasive too on this forum. Not sure if i can say who due to mods. I have been temp banned just for talking too much about a specific person even though for once i agreed with them in most respects and didn't insult except maybe once with a very mild insult.
Sheesh ashiraya why didn't you just go for peregrine if that was the case. Also keep in mind you're a grand total of 18 years old. Even if the age gap and massive distance between the two of you didn't get in the way then i'm sure your inexperience probably would. Not saying i have experience either but i have probably talked to a bunch of women and found out some things.
I once got temp banned for inferring that Americans are fat
I don't think ash should have gone for peregrine, i mean sheesh, imagine the arguments
You better delete that post (has swearing in it not that I care as I have a potty mouth, but the mods would) I would hate for this thread to get banned.
Cheesecat wrote: You better delete that post (has swearing in it not that I care as I have a potty mouth, but the mods would) I would hate for this thread to get banned.
I think it's called divergence or perhaps straying from the topic, fear not we shall get back to topic soon enough. In regard to the peregrine/ash thing, i think we are allowed a little fun now that ash has declared her unrequited(?) love for peregrine
I asked my rookie climber who cannot peel bananas anymore if she wanted to come to the cinema bis double feature at the Cinémathèque (movies about Chuck Norris and Van Damme being macho men, but since it is as the Cinémathèque, I can pretend it is a high-class social activity, right ?) but she was too busy with her biology study.
It has been told time and time again in this thread that movie dates are bad, but how bad exactly would you rate a date for a double-feature of Black Eagle (Van Damme) and Silent rage (Chuck Norris) at the Cinémathèque ?
This is completely random, but it is mostly a desperate attempt to get this thread back on topic.
flamingkillamajig wrote: You can't like Peregrine! I don't like Peregrine therefore you are wrong!!!!!!!!
Don't feel too jealous, you can always become the president of the "I Hate Peregrine" club. But maybe you should move the discussion to a different thread so that it doesn't keep hijacking this one. You could even start a poll!
Hybrid Son Of Oxayotl wrote: It has been told time and time again in this thread that movie dates are bad, but how bad exactly would you rate a date for a double-feature of Black Eagle (Van Damme) and Silent rage (Chuck Norris) at the Cinémathèque ?
The choice of movie doesn't matter, what matters is what you do around the movie. A movie is 2-3 hours of sitting silently and ignoring each other, so you want to make sure you follow it with something more interactive. The conventional "dinner and then a movie" idea is really bad because once the sitting in silence is over you split up and that's the end of it.
That's not quite what i said peregrine. To an extent i don't like you but it's more the curious things you sometimes stand for. I'm just more puzzled a girl can 10 out of 10 you. I mean 7 or 8 out of 10 but barely knows you on the internet and basically wants to build a statue of you is quite a bit.
@Hybrid: Just remember how it happens. If she shows interest by looking excited then you have a better chance than if she looks very bored. Of course i figure this would be more obvious to some but i figure we're not the most sociable group.
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Anyway i can't remember who it was but whoever told me not to look for a gamer girl helped. I didn't read the article and came to a somewhat different conclusion but yeah i'd just rather be with somebody that treats me well. Anyway we'll see how things go when i get back to school. At the very least due to a web-comic i had the realization that the previous girl i really liked wasn't so great. I'm sure there are a lot more worthwhile women out there who don't game.
flamingkillamajig wrote: I'm just more puzzled a girl can 10 out of 10 you. I mean 7 or 8 out of 10 but barely knows you on the internet and basically wants to build a statue of you is quite a bit.
I'm only going to reply to this because there's a general point to be made: these things are incredibly subjective. One person's 7/10 is another person's 10/10 and a third person's 0/10, and none of them are objectively correct. Some people put a lot of weight on stubbornly defending the right ideas and are willing to form a strong opinion of a person without ever meeting them*. Some people have much less flattering things to say about internet arguments and/or refuse to hand out 0/10 or 10/10 opinions based only on a person's writing. But trying to say things like "you shouldn't rate people 10/10 until you meet them" or "you should be more attracted to {insert attribute I like}" is rarely going to accomplish something, just like trying to convince someone of the superiority of your preferred hair color rarely ends in anything but agreeing to disagree. Just accept that lots of people are attracted to the "wrong" things and put your effort into finding the people who are attracted to things you have.
*You might find this post very informative as well.
Peregrine wrote: The choice of movie doesn't matter, what matters is what you do around the movie. A movie is 2-3 hours of sitting silently and ignoring each other, so you want to make sure you follow it with something more interactive.
Well, there is the 30 minutes between the movies . The big problem is that it ends slightly before midnight and the last train to go back home is slightly after midnight, and it is a bit late to do stuff, but if I can sleep in Paris and therefore am not in a rush to go back home, just discuss in a bar.
flamingkillamajig wrote: @Hybrid: Just remember how it happens. If she shows interest by looking excited then you have a better chance than if she looks very bored.
flamingkillamajig wrote: Anyway i can't remember who it was but whoever told me not to look for a gamer girl helped. I didn't read the article and came to a somewhat different conclusion but yeah i'd just rather be with somebody that treats me well. Anyway we'll see how things go when i get back to school. At the very least due to a web-comic i had the realization that the previous girl i really liked wasn't so great. I'm sure there are a lot more worthwhile women out there who don't game.
The point is not to look for someone who's not your idea of ideal, but to be more broad about it so you don't have to settle with someone unsuited to you. Focusing in too much on the gamergirls just narrowed the pool you had to work with, so you would have overlooked good matches just on that one point.
flamingkillamajig wrote: I'm just more puzzled a girl can 10 out of 10 you. I mean 7 or 8 out of 10 but barely knows you on the internet and basically wants to build a statue of you is quite a bit.
I'm only going to reply to this because there's a general point to be made: these things are incredibly subjective. One person's 7/10 is another person's 10/10 and a third person's 0/10, and none of them are objectively correct. Some people put a lot of weight on stubbornly defending the right ideas and are willing to form a strong opinion of a person without ever meeting them*. Some people have much less flattering things to say about internet arguments and/or refuse to hand out 0/10 or 10/10 opinions based only on a person's writing. But trying to say things like "you shouldn't rate people 10/10 until you meet them" or "you should be more attracted to {insert attribute I like}" is rarely going to accomplish something, just like trying to convince someone of the superiority of your preferred hair color rarely ends in anything but agreeing to disagree. Just accept that lots of people are attracted to the "wrong" things and put your effort into finding the people who are attracted to things you have.
*You might find this post very informative as well.
I give Peregrine a 6/10 as even though i admire his determination his head looks vaguely birdlike and just doesn't fire up my loins
In regard to the convincing others of your favourite hair colour, yep, nah don't do it. I think last time I tried to do this on dakka i ended up being called a racialist. This has also happened IRL. I still feel it's my personal choice what i find attractive physically, but apparently i should find every one attractive. *shrug*
I also agree on the movie thing, I never get watching movies with people, as it's a solo activity.Watching tv is also a solo activity but at least you can t5alk without being glared at.
Bullockist wrote: In regard to the convincing others of your favourite hair colour, yep, nah don't do it.
I do not even understand how one could have a favorite hair color. I mean, you cannot just consider the hair color without taking everything else into account . Some people will look better with one hair color, other with another hair color.
Bullockist wrote: My favourite moment so far has to be hybrid and his 50% lesbian thing
I really have no idea what you are talking about. What was that?
Bullockist wrote: In regard to the convincing others of your favourite hair colour, yep, nah don't do it.
I do not even understand how one could have a favorite hair color. I mean, you cannot just consider the hair color without taking everything else into account . Some people will look better with one hair color, other with another hair color.
Well put it this way i'm not a fan of blonde hair,all other hair i love and the longer and straighter the better- red heads get a bonus for wavy though . I dunno hair is just important for me. If i get married and my wife cuts her hair I swear I'm going to the hair dresser, getting her discarded tresses and taking them home and having a wake. I have been attracted to women with blonde hair but i can count them on 2 hands. All other hair colours i couldn't count.
Don't you all have some physical attribute you find adds attractiveness? Please don't give me this guff about the whole person or personality. We are talking attraction here, pure physical attraction, you know when you first meet some one and you thing wow, (s)he's (<--- goddamn i'm politically correct right there and inclusive) hot. What i mean is if you put someone there with a boy cut hair as compared to long tresses, the boy cut will feature far lower in attractiveness for me even if it was the same person. Although that said I was very strongly attracted to a girl with a shaved head and a fringe once.
Bullockist wrote: Don't you all have some physical attribute you find adds attractiveness?
Head. I find headless women (and men, actually) way less attractive .
I have been attracted to very different women and I could really not pinpoint one thing and say “Women with this are more attractive than women with this”.
So.... Seems like i just got a date! Girl called me and confirmed that we are gonna meet on Saturday.... Considering it worked well when i met her and during the phone chats, i guess i should mess with her (to certain limits of course)... so better for me to not drink more than 2,3 beers Wish me luck dakka!
Guys....question, how should I treat the girl who stood me up? She is still talking tome, asking for help in class, staring at me during class And everything? Should I tell her off or just be nice and help here with her hw?
hotsauceman1 wrote: Guys....question, how should I treat the girl who stood me up? She is still talking tome, asking for help in class, staring at me during class And everything? Should I tell her off or just be nice and help here with her hw?
did she give you a reason for standing you up that seemed legit?
generally though, even if she is actually interested in you, people who cannot be bothered to at least tell you they wont show up, dont really have your interests at heart.
put simply, would you stand someone up, without at least a good reason or a call to let them know you wont be there? If you wouldnt do it to someone, dont let them do it to you.
ladies dig guys who set boundaries and expect good treatment of themselves, I think they understand that it gets reciprocated, so those who expect highly of their partners, also have high expectations of themselves.
Personally I'd give her one more chance. She may have freaked out that it was on valentines day thus sending out a stronger message than she was ready to give. I'd treat her as per normal, even if she stood me up a second time. The 2nd time she stood me up would be the last time though. Have you asked her why she didn't turn up?
Oh you help her with her HW? hmmmmm maybe she's doing it for the school help. I'd still give her one more chance though, i don't think there's any need to get all pissy and cold about things.
NW that swellfella! good luck and i hope that things swell up for you on the date, those 2 beers might be a good idea
Bullockist wrote: Personally I'd give her one more chance. She may have freaked out that it was on valentines day thus sending out a stronger message than she was ready to give. I'd treat her as per normal, even if she stood me up a second time. The 2nd time she stood me up would be the last time though. Have you asked her why she didn't turn up?
Oh you help her with her HW? hmmmmm maybe she's doing it for the school help. I'd still give her one more chance though, i don't think there's any need to get all pissy and cold about things.
NW that swellfella! good luck and i hope that things swell up for you on the date, those 2 beers might be a good idea
Talking to here and looking back, I realize she is a nice person, in the sense she doesn't or didn't want confrontation and looks a bit slow on the uptake.
But she has a boyfriend and a girlfriend, so she is a bit outta bounds right now.
hotsauceman1 wrote: Guys....question, how should I treat the girl who stood me up? She is still talking tome, asking for help in class, staring at me during class And everything? Should I tell her off or just be nice and help here with her hw?
Did you ask her "hey, what happened on {day}, I thought we had plans"? If she had a legitimate excuse (including an excuse for not telling you that she was canceling) and at least made a token show of regret then just accept it and move on. You're probably not going to get a date, but you might as well at least be (very casual) friends in class. If she didn't have a legitimate reason then no, you shouldn't give her help or anything, and you should tell her why. And if you just passively accepted that she was incredibly rude to you and never bothered to confront her about it then that's entirely your fault, and you're probably going to continue to give her homework help no matter what we say.
So I think I am basically on the other side of the situation for once. Kind of feels wierd. How do I approach this, I know very little about her. I am not very interested, but I think the practice would be good. I am running an iron kingdoms game later this week, think that would be a good idea? 
Help?
.
off, but imma fall for it this time and give her a chance.
and then the club was recalling this girl who left since people were always staring into her and she was fed up by swearing one's entire bloodline/deities when one would roll disastrously etc etc... 
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