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These all make me lol.

I dont know any

"were out of range.." Basilisk Artillery Commander

"Way to much dakka..." Orks on the punisher gatling cannon

Inquisitor: "Tell me again Vindicare, why he is not dead?"
Vindicare" "I missed. "

purplefood wrote:"How many Black Crusades does it take to invade Cadia?"-Creed's Ultimate Unsolvable Riddle

"I've never made it without failing...go ask Mr. Tzeentch."
~Abaddon the Despoiler

"Those tomb spiders will NEVER find the line with the missing semi-colon. That's what you get for using a poor IDE!"
~Imperial hacker messing with Necron source code.

"Good afternoon Hive Fleet, welcome to McImperium; may I take your order?"

Necron Warrior - So why'd we destroy those blue mecha aliens again? They brought us cake!
Necron Lord - That was no cake.
Necron Warrior - You mean?
Necron Lord - Yes. The cake was a lie.
Necron Warrior - Run: Sadface.exe

Marine - Sir! We've discovered another STC!
Captain - Excellent! What is it for?
Marine - I'm not sure sir, but this bit here says 'IKEA'
Captain - And the pieces?
Marine - All here... No, wait, we're missing screw B2 that holds it all together!
Captain - Then why does it stand completed before our eyes?

Guardsman - Um, sir? Is that bush supposed to have eyes?

"Are you sure this is what you saw, Magnus?"
"Definately, I saw it with my own eyes... eye..."

"What is Fulgrim doing?"
"I believe it was an old Terran ritual known as the 'YMCA'."

World Eaters Marine 1 - "Do you think maybe Angron was dropped as a child? Or maybe repeatedly smashed headfirst into a mountain?"
World Eaters Marine 2 - "What makes you say that?"
Angron - "I ordered a DIET coke! DIET!!!"
World Eaters Marine 1 - "No reason."

Ok. So I was inspired by the great James Earl Jones earlier today.

I present a motivational speech by Lysander!

"The one constant through all the years has been the bolter. The Galaxy has rolled by like an army of steamrollers. It's been erased like a blackboard, rebuilt, and erased again. But the bolter has marked the time. This armor, this weapon, is part of our past. It reminds us of all that once was good, and that could be again. Oh, heretics will die. Heretics will most definitely die."

Sister of Battle:"Oh no,all this heat is giving me spilt ends"

some quotes from my chaos space marine project.

"The Forgetful shall be forgotten!"-Sons of Remembrance warcry
"Fear? You don't no true fear! True fear is being forgetten by the world around you; so much that you start to forget yourself!"-Random marine from the Sons of Remembrance
"May the wrath of my god pulverise you into oblivion and make all your folowers forget you!"-Secret Bearer of the Sons of Remembrance

and, for all you who follow my chaos marine blog, a spoiler!



Hope you all like it!


M.K

"remember how i said not to push the big red button? Push the big red button!" Imperial guard deathstrike commander.

Cyberjesus wrote:"remember how i said not to push the big red button? Push the big red button!" Imperial guard deathstrike commander.

that sounds like the kind of thing the guys in red vs blue would say...probably church to kaboose (sp?)

I thouht it came from the original Cats vs. Dogs movie...

Cyberjesus wrote:"remember how i said not to push the big red button? Push the big red button!" Imperial guard deathstrike commander.

I think it's actually either a quotation or a rephrase of something from the original Men In Black.

"Damn, I forgot to duck."-Every one in three imperial guardsmen that ever died.

"F*ck the line."-The rest of them

"Look,now is not the best time dear..."
"I'm at work,okay...."
"Right...I'm not sure when I'll be back home"
"Listen the boss is coming over"
"I have to go...Oh come on dear I have to get back to the front line...Ok,ok...I love you too"

-Last recorded vox transmission before the fall of Outpost IIVX on Octum Prime-

Avatar 720 wrote:Marine - Sir! We've discovered another STC!
Captain - Excellent! What is it for?
Marine - I'm not sure sir, but this bit here says 'IKEA'
Captain - And the pieces?
Marine - All here... No, wait, we're missing screw B2 that holds it all together!
Captain - Then why does it stand completed before our eyes?

I've been gradually reading through this thread for a while, but that one in particular made me cackle.

SM sergeant: "Crazos?"
Crazos: "Yes sir?"
SM sergeant: "due to losses in our last mission, you will now be using the plasma rifle, careful, every 1 in 6 shots it explodes"
Crazos looks down at plasma rifle "...looks like this'll be my last mission"

Quickly... someone revive this thread.

Seriously, it has been going downhill since page 2...

Fetterkey wrote:

Cyberjesus wrote:"remember how i said not to push the big red button? Push the big red button!" Imperial guard deathstrike commander.

I think it's actually either a quotation or a rephrase of something from the original Men In Black.

Yes, it's the button that makes transforms the car in a kind of low altitude missile

A rhino takes a stray bolter round, stalling out. A full load of battle brothers is in the back, trying to get to the front.

Brother Sergeant: "Get us moving again!"
Battle Brother: "Is stuck, yes?
The brother sergeant shoves another battle brother out of the way as he tries to repair the vehicle. "Back off! You don't know the components!"
BB: "Componants." (begins hammering away at the engine casing in a rage) "Terran componants, Medusan componants... ALL MADE ON MARS!" (The rhino sputters to life) "There!" (hits the engine again) "We can go home!"

Ravenwing land speeder pilot 'How do I land again?'

Tyranid motivational poster 'If all else fails your comrades are edible.'

Farseer almost gets hit by a stray bullet, "WOAH, where'd that come from?!"

Emperor, look out!
What? (bullet just misses him)
Jesus Christ!

winnertakesall wrote:Emperor, look out!
What? (bullet just misses him)
Jesus Christ!

Adeptus Custodes: Who's that?

Adeptus Custodes 2: I dunno but he must be pretty beast if the big E took his name in vain.

-----

Commissar in mess hall: ALRIGHT, WHO TOOK THE LAST DONUT?! *cocks bolt pistol*

-----

*man hears a knock on his door and opens it*

Inquisitor: By the authority of the Emperor's Inquisition, I hereby sentence you and your--...................I'm sorry, you're not Mr. Heretic are you?

Man: Uhm, no, he lives across the street.

Inquisitor: My apologies, damn navy intel *turns and leaves, man shuts door, woman walks into room*

Woman: Who was that?

Man: Nothing, just another door to door inquisitor.

Ghazghkull Mag Uruk Thrakka, upon hearing of the death of Sebastian Yarrick:

"Alas, poor Yarrick! I knew dat git!"

AlmightyWalrus wrote:Ghazghkull Mag Uruk Thrakka, upon hearing of the death of Sebastian Yarrick:

"Alas, poor Yarrick! I knew dat git!"

Hamlet quotations FTW

Tmonster wrote:

AlmightyWalrus wrote:Ghazghkull Mag Uruk Thrakka, upon hearing of the death of Sebastian Yarrick:

"Alas, poor Yarrick! I knew dat git!"

Hamlet quotations FTW

While we're at it:

"But soft, what light through younder window breaks? A Baneblade?! CREEEEEEEED!!"

AlmightyWalrus wrote:

Tmonster wrote:

AlmightyWalrus wrote:Ghazghkull Mag Uruk Thrakka, upon hearing of the death of Sebastian Yarrick:

"Alas, poor Yarrick! I knew dat git!"

Hamlet quotations FTW

While we're at it:

"But soft, what light through younder window breaks? A Baneblade?! CREEEEEEEED!!"

"let slip the squigs of war."

Frailty thy name is Abaddon.

WAAAAAAA ... ack cough cough cough Iz gotz a bit of squig in the back oz me thoat. AHEM
WAAAAAAAAAHG! ah much better.

IG soldier overthrows grenade. "I knew i shouldnt of had that popcorn earlier."

Dead necron lays on the ground exlcaiming "Can of corn, Can of corn and I'll be back."

*A nob making fun of a grot in a trench*
N- "Yoo iz so fick! I betcha can't even frow a grenade!"
G- "Oh yeah?"
*matter-of-factly pulls pin out, throws pin.*
G- "See? I'm not that-"
N- "Oh, shi-"
*KABOOOM!!!*