| Author |
Message |
 |
|
|
|
|
Advert
|
Forum adverts like this one are shown to any user who is not logged in. Join us by filling out a tiny 3 field form and you will get your own, free, dakka user account which gives a good range of benefits to you:
- No adverts like this in the forums anymore.
- Times and dates in your local timezone.
- Full tracking of what you have read so you can skip to your first unread post, easily see what has changed since you last logged in, and easily see what is new at a glance.
- Email notifications for threads you want to watch closely.
- Being a part of the oldest wargaming community on the net.
If you are already a member then feel free to login now. |
|
 |
2009/08/07 13:05:27
Subject: 40k Humour - Some randomness
|
|
Sister Vastly Superior
|
Creed can outflank an emperor titan through a one-story house, and nobody would notice.
Dont argue, you know its true.
(also, what happens when creed outflanks Marbo?)
|
I collect:
Guard - 2k of mostly infantry
DA - 2k of deathwing, 2k of other bits (no vehicles)
Sisters - mostly converted/proxy because I'm waiting for therange to go plastic.
Tau - 2k with no riptides because I can. |
|
|
 |
|
2009/08/07 14:03:29
Subject: 40k Humour - Some randomness
|
|
Roarin' Runtherd
melbourne
|
divide by zero.
|
 - 2400 |
|
|
|
|
2009/08/07 14:52:17
Subject: 40k Humour - Some randomness
|
|
Growlin' Guntrukk Driver with Killacannon
|
shadowice558 wrote:divide by zero.
So THATS where the eye of terror comes from! 
|
|
|
|
|
|
2009/08/07 14:57:42
Subject: 40k Humour - Some randomness
|
|
Arch Magos w/ 4 Meg of RAM
|
I lol'd so hard at that. Creed outflanked Marbo, which caused a division of zero and spawned the Eye of Terror.
|
|
This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2009/08/07 15:00:14
|
|
|
|
|
2009/08/07 15:10:58
Subject: Re:40k Humour - Some randomness
|
|
Battleship Captain
|
I've been on the receiving end of a sound cannon a lot.
|
|
|
|
|
2009/08/07 15:11:42
Subject: 40k Humour - Some randomness
|
|
Arch Magos w/ 4 Meg of RAM
|
With that squad finally finished, I hope to have my friends join you over there.
|
|
|
|
|
|
2009/08/07 17:38:56
Subject: 40k Humour - Some randomness
|
|
Roarin' Runtherd
melbourne
|
sound cannons are nothin.
try having a nob squad stand up to 1000 points of IG shooting. almost lit my smoke...almost.
|
- 2400 |
|
|
|
|
2009/08/07 23:05:18
Subject: 40k Humour - Some randomness
|
|
Committed Chaos Cult Marine
|
LOL TO ALL OF THEM!!!!
|
95% of teens would go into a panic attack if the jonas brothers were about to jump off the empire state building copy and paste this if you are the 5% who would pull up a lawn chair grab some popcorn and yell JUMP BITCHES!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Mekboy wrote:Tzeentch: Full house! Yay!
Deciver: Straight Flush! Yay!
Eldrad: Four of a kind! Awww!
Creed: Warhound titan. Die, xenos scum!
|
|
|
|
|
2009/08/08 04:45:15
Subject: 40k Humour - Some randomness
|
|
Apprehensive Inquisitorial Apprentice
|
person person wrote:LOL TO ALL OF THEM!!!!
Canadians...Seriously.
|
I have lived long enough, for I die unconquered. |
|
|
|
|
2010/08/08 05:15:50
Subject: Re:40k Humour - Some randomness
|
|
Hardened Veteran Guardsman
|
Found these random things
![]()  " border="0" />
|
|
This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2009/08/08 05:56:45
 1500 (Work In Progress) |
|
|
|
|
2009/08/08 06:38:31
Subject: 40k Humour - Some randomness
|
|
Member of the Malleus
San Francisco Bay, CA, Ancient Terra, Sol System
|
Buy a pair of the power fists, paint them blue, become the smurf king!!!
Automatically Appended Next Post:
every baneblade needs more cocaine.
|
|
This message was edited 2 times. Last update was at 2009/08/08 06:46:19
|
|
|
|
|
2009/08/08 06:50:10
Subject: Re:40k Humour - Some randomness
|
|
Battlewagon Driver with Charged Engine
|
t-minus 10 until appearance of cheese
|
|
This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2009/08/08 06:52:17
H.B.M.C. wrote:
"Balance, playtesting - a casual gamer craves not these things!" - Yoda, a casual gamer.
Three things matter in marksmanship -
location, location, locationMagickalMemories wrote:How about making another fist?
One can be, "Da Fist uv Mork" and the second can be, "Da Uvver Fist uv Mork."
Make a third, and it can be, "Da Uvver Uvver Fist uv Mork"
Eric
|
|
|
|
|
2009/08/08 07:31:36
Subject: 40k Humour - Some randomness
|
|
Gore-Soaked Lunatic Witchhunter
Australia (Recently ravaged by the Hive Fleet Ginger Overlord)
|
LOL That was a great one shadowrocket!
|
Smacks wrote:
After the game, pack up all your miniatures, then slap the guy next to you on the ass and say.
"Good game guys, now lets hit the showers" 
|
|
|
|
|
2009/08/08 11:40:47
Subject: Re:40k Humour - Some randomness
|
|
Battleship Captain
The Land of the Rising Sun
|
SM VS Final Fantasy
M.
|
Jenkins: You don't have jurisdiction here!
Smith Jamison: We aren't here, which means when we open up on you and shred your bodies with automatic fire then this will never have happened.
About the Clans: "Those brief outbursts of sense can't hold back the wave of sibko bred, over hormoned sociopaths that they crank out though." |
|
|
|
|
2009/08/08 11:51:46
Subject: 40k Humour - Some randomness
|
|
Lady of the Lake
|
crazypsyko666 wrote:Buy a pair of the power fists, paint them blue, become the smurf king!!!
Automatically Appended Next Post:
every baneblade needs more cocaine.
They make a mask as well.
So now you too can pretend to be part of the Necron threat. Or a Chaplain or something like that.
|
|
|
|
|
|
2009/08/08 12:25:06
Subject: 40k Humour - Some randomness
|
|
Gore-Soaked Lunatic Witchhunter
Australia (Recently ravaged by the Hive Fleet Ginger Overlord)
|
lol
|
Smacks wrote:
After the game, pack up all your miniatures, then slap the guy next to you on the ass and say.
"Good game guys, now lets hit the showers"
|
|
|
|
|
2009/08/08 13:29:35
Subject: Re:40k Humour - Some randomness
|
|
Killer Klaivex
|
youbedead wrote:
t-minus 10 until appearance of cheese
PURGE! CRUSH! KILL! REND THEM LIMB FROM LIMB!
Ahem... indeed.
I love /tg/.
|
People are like dice, a certain Frenchman said that. You throw yourself in the direction of your own choosing. People are free because they can do that. Everyone's circumstances are different, but no matter how small the choice, at the very least, you can throw yourself. It's not chance or fate. It's the choice you made. |
|
|
|
|
2009/08/09 00:17:14
Subject: Re:40k Humour - Some randomness
|
|
Hardened Veteran Guardsman
|
The Real reason the Hindenburg crashed...
And the loota captain
 Automatically Appended Next Post: Oh and to whomever said that one could pretend to be part of the Necron threat....
The threat is very real.....Just look at what they did to that Carnifex
|
|
This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2009/08/09 00:21:59
1500 (Work In Progress) |
|
|
|
|
2009/08/09 10:07:11
Subject: 40k Humour - Some randomness
|
|
Lethal Lhamean
|
|
|
|
|
|
2009/08/09 10:53:57
Subject: 40k Humour - Some randomness
|
|
Wing Commander
|
El Oh El
|
"In the Grim Darkness of the far future; there is only countless Requisition Forms, filled in Triplicate."
|
|
|
|
|
2009/08/09 11:38:48
Subject: 40k Humour - Some randomness
|
|
Killer Klaivex
|
|
People are like dice, a certain Frenchman said that. You throw yourself in the direction of your own choosing. People are free because they can do that. Everyone's circumstances are different, but no matter how small the choice, at the very least, you can throw yourself. It's not chance or fate. It's the choice you made. |
|
|
|
|
2009/08/09 11:57:52
Subject: 40k Humour - Some randomness
|
|
Slaanesh Chosen Marine Riding a Fiend
Sale, Manchester, England
|
 Automatically Appended Next Post: OH YEAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!
nice warboss...............
|
|
This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2009/08/09 12:04:48
My blog here, here and here...
Beware the silent wolf, not all packs howl as they hunt. |
|
|
|
|
2009/08/09 13:56:59
Subject: 40k Humour - Some randomness
|
|
Lethal Lhamean
|
inject heroin in your dick is lolx2
|
|
|
|
|
2009/08/09 14:12:18
Subject: Re:40k Humour - Some randomness
|
|
Potent Possessed Daemonvessel
|
The 40k Vs Final fantasy one made me lol
Those poor little spess marienhz.
|
|
|
|
|
2009/08/09 14:15:37
Subject: 40k Humour - Some randomness
|
|
Arch Magos w/ 4 Meg of RAM
|
Man, if Doomrider was in the current 'dex, I'd take him to every game.
|
|
|
|
|
|
2009/08/09 15:21:43
Subject: Re:40k Humour - Some randomness
|
|
Stinky Spore
|
|
 Bad Moons |
|
|
|
|
2009/08/10 02:09:56
Subject: 40k Humour - Some randomness
|
|
Killer Klaivex
|
A Keeper of Secrets walks into a bar. The barkeep asks: why the long face?
----------------------
An unaligned heretic asks a Thousand Son, "Magician, can you turn me into a Slaaneshi?"
"Sure," replies the Son, "but in order to turn you into a Slaaneshi, we'll need to take away 30% of your brain, make you 80% more likely to give a blowjob to one of Nurgle's boys, and add two inches to your penis."
The heretic agrees and the Thousand Son begins his spell.
When they're done, the Thousand Son is confused. "Sir, I'm very sorry, but apparently there were some complications with the spell. I accidently took away 80% of your brain, made you 30% queerer, and removed two inches from your penis. Is this all right with you?"
The heretic replies, "BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD"
---------------
A Mutant, A Heretic, and a Witch all walk into a bar.
The world is destroyed by Exterminatus.
---------------
We should all know the parody on that Imperial prayer from Ciaphas Cain:
When in mortal danger,
When beset by doubt.
Run in little circles,
Wave your arms and shout!
---------------
Ok, so there's a Chaos cruiser, an Imperium cruiser and an Eldar cruiser fighting in deep space. Suddenly a warp storm engulfs the ships and a strange being speaks to the commanders. It says it's an ancient warp entity with the power to grant wishes, and it gives one wish to all 3 captains. Whatever they ask for will be granted them.
The Imperium captain gets down on his knees and prays: "Oh creature, in the name of the Emperor, destroy all creatures of Chaos and the heresy they bring!" The warp spirit nods.
The Chaos captain shakes his fist and screams: "DENIZEN OF THE WARP! I WISH ONLY FOR ALL SERVANTS OF THE FALSE EMPEROR TO BE CLEANSED FROM THE GALAXY, AND FOR THE IMPERIUM OF MAN TO BE DESTROYED!" The creature nods again.
The Eldar captain gets up from his chair, looks at the apparition and asks: "So, both their wishes have come true now, right?" The creature says "Yes, indeed they have."
Then the Eldar sits back down, strokes his chin and says: "I'll have a coffee, then."
--------------
Space Marine Commander, Sisters of Battle Canoness and a Commissar are arguing about which one leads the bravest troops.
SM Commander says: "My Space Marines could jump out of the 100th floor of this building."
The other say to prove it, so he calls one Space Marine and says:
SMC: "Jump out of 100th floor of this building"
Space Marine: "As you command!" and jumps
SoB Canoness says: "My Sisters of Battle could jump out of the 200th floor of this building"
The other say to prove it, so she calls one Sister of Battle and says:
SoB Cannoness: "Jump out of 200th floor of this building"
Sister of Battle: "For the Emperor!" and she jumps
The Commissar says that his guardsmen could do the same, so he calls one guardsman and says:
Commissar: "Jump out of the 300th floor of this building
Guardsman: "Sir, no sir!"
Commissar: "And THAT'S Courage!"
|
People are like dice, a certain Frenchman said that. You throw yourself in the direction of your own choosing. People are free because they can do that. Everyone's circumstances are different, but no matter how small the choice, at the very least, you can throw yourself. It's not chance or fate. It's the choice you made. |
|
|
|
|
2009/08/10 02:27:46
Subject: 40k Humour - Some randomness
|
|
Bounding Dark Angels Assault Marine
|
Cheese Elemental
---------------
Ok, so there's a Chaos cruiser, an Imperium cruiser and an Eldar cruiser fighting in deep space. Suddenly a warp storm engulfs the ships and a strange being speaks to the commanders. It says it's an ancient warp entity with the power to grant wishes, and it gives one wish to all 3 captains. Whatever they ask for will be granted them.
The Imperium captain gets down on his knees and prays: "Oh creature, in the name of the Emperor, destroy all creatures of Chaos and the heresy they bring!" The warp spirit nods.
The Chaos captain shakes his fist and screams: "DENIZEN OF THE WARP! I WISH ONLY FOR ALL SERVANTS OF THE FALSE EMPEROR TO BE CLEANSED FROM THE GALAXY, AND FOR THE IMPERIUM OF MAN TO BE DESTROYED!" The creature nods again.
The Eldar captain gets up from his chair, looks at the apparition and asks: "So, both their wishes have come true now, right?" The creature says "Yes, indeed they have."
Then the Eldar sits back down, strokes his chin and says: "I'll have a coffee, then."
lol
|
|
This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2009/08/10 02:29:32
Alpharius wrote:I absolutely LOVE it when you guys get the Kilkrazy machine fired up! Those women... so darn cute!!!
|
|
|
|
|
2009/08/10 06:17:25
Subject: 40k Humour - Some randomness
|
|
Member of the Malleus
San Francisco Bay, CA, Ancient Terra, Sol System
|
Cheese Elemental wrote:A Keeper of Secrets walks into a bar. The barkeep asks: why the long face?
----------------------
Ok, so there's a Chaos cruiser, an Imperium cruiser and an Eldar cruiser fighting in deep space. Suddenly a warp storm engulfs the ships and a strange being speaks to the commanders. It says it's an ancient warp entity with the power to grant wishes, and it gives one wish to all 3 captains. Whatever they ask for will be granted them.
The Imperium captain gets down on his knees and prays: "Oh creature, in the name of the Emperor, destroy all creatures of Chaos and the heresy they bring!" The warp spirit nods.
The Chaos captain shakes his fist and screams: "DENIZEN OF THE WARP! I WISH ONLY FOR ALL SERVANTS OF THE FALSE EMPEROR TO BE CLEANSED FROM THE GALAXY, AND FOR THE IMPERIUM OF MAN TO BE DESTROYED!" The creature nods again.
The Eldar captain gets up from his chair, looks at the apparition and asks: "So, both their wishes have come true now, right?" The creature says "Yes, indeed they have."
Then the Eldar sits back down, strokes his chin and says: "I'll have a coffee, then."
--------------
Cheeky Eldar bastards.
|
|
|
|
|
|
2009/08/10 07:05:28
Subject: Re:40k Humour - Some randomness
|
|
Executing Exarch
|
While not specifically 40K, this is what I think our general image is to the public....
|
|
This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2009/08/10 07:13:58
DR:80+S(GT)G++M++B-I++Pwmhd05#+D+++A+++/sWD-R++T(Ot)DM+
How is it they live in such harmony - the billions of stars - when most men can barely go a minute without declaring war in their minds about someone they know.
- St. Thomas Aquinas
Warhammer 40K:
 Alpha Legion - 15,000 pts For the Emperor!
 WAAAGH! Skullhooka - 14,000 pts
 Biel Tan Strikeforce - 11,000 pts
"The Eldar get no attention because the average male does not like confetti blasters, shimmer shields or sparkle lasers."
-Illeix |
|
|
|
|
|
|
and 
Black Templars with GK allies WIP 
Chaos Daemons: 2220 points, under construction. 
